An Apology To Subscribers …. And The Flood Of Reviews From Today …….. V””V

To all those that are subscribed to my blog please forgive, what I know to be an annoying influx on email pinging (my husband is subscribed) this afternoon.  As True Blood season 5 sneak peeks are going to start appearing on HBO this weekend it got me to thinking about my reviews from Season 4 and how it would be easier for everyone to access them on my blog.

After a large glass of wine it seemed like a very good idea to transfer them from their original home at The Vampire Loving Dorks Facebook page to here on my blog at WordPress where my season 5 review / spoiler posts will be.  As I already had a category for reviews my wine addled mind assumed that people subscribed to “My Vampyric  Musings” would be safe.  4 Email pings later on my husbands phone I realized that this was an error but by that point I was a transferring fiend and would be stopped for no one.
So if, like him, you were grinding your teeth and the constant invasion please rest assured this was a one-off occurrence, not to be repeated EVER.  I adore each and every one of you that take the time to read (and occasionally comment) on my little vampyric thoughts and my crazy dark musings and would hate to lose a single one of you.

With that said I will leave you to enjoy whatever part of the day it is where you are (Saturday evening here) as I pick up another glass of red wine and head to play Guitar Hero with my husband and son.

Until next time …..
V””V

 

True Blood Season 4 Ep 12 SEASON FINALE – And When I Die SPOILER Note V””V

Blog Originally Posted in Vampire Loving Dorks September 2011 – Reposting as Season 5 2012 Blogs will be here

So here we are ….. after what seemed like an eternity waiting for Season 4 to premiere and we are suddenly at the finale.  How did that happen so quickly??  Well it has and here is my finale spoiler note and here are my thoughts … and YES they are MY thoughts and not a non-bias review so feel free to disagree, bitch, complain, or agree … it all works for me 😀 lol  Alan Ball has teased us with tears, anguish, and a high body count … lets see what he delivered!!!

At the end of last week we saw the very annoyed ghost of Marnie possess Lafayette while he lay resting in his bed.  This week starts with Jesus giving a heartfelt speech about how he is sorry for dragging Lafayette into the magic during which Lafayette/Marnie sits totally impassively until Jesus kisses him/her goodbye and he realises his beloved Lafayette is possessed and being the smart cookie he is it only takes him one guess to realise who is in there.  Sadly for Jesus he reacts immediately and ends up with his hand pinned to the table by a dinner fork …. OUCH!!!

Sookie meanwhile is at her house with Tara making coffee and dealing with flashes of her Gran laying dead on the kitchen floor where she was murdered leading to the question is Gran in Heaven?  Tara admits that she is an atheist but says that if there is a Heaven she is pretty sure Adele Stackhouse would be like the president.. hmmm yes quite amusing Tara ……. but lost on Sookie as she broods on the fact that she “feels Gran is near.”

Out in the cemetery Sam and Maxine are saying goodbye to Tommy who as Maxine says was a devious little son of a bitch but she felt he had a good heart despite stealing her clothes including her underpants and her good church shoes …. hmmmmm ok yes that’s what you talk about at a graveside …. but anyway the main point of this is that Maxine is feeling sorry for Sam and tells him that she is now his Mama and she is going to bring round one of her famous pork-rind casseroles (ummm yuck) … as they are all the family they have left.   Did you forget your REAL son there Maxine??? Hoyt is still alive you know…… hmmmmmm I am guessing this is leading up to something for Season 5 ….. after all Tommy sold the rights to Maxine’s land … maybe she will need a place to stay and turn to Sam :S …. I don’t know ….. can’t quite decide what Alan Ball’s angle was on this one yet!

Staying in the great outdoors Jason has decided to go and confess all to Hoyt about Jessica (driving some truck … what happened to his truck??? Did I totally miss something here??? Not that it’s important but it bugged me so answers please if anyone has them lol)….. Anyway Jason confesses he had sex with Jessica and Hoyt asks how?  Now any one of us would realise that Hoyt wanted to know HOW IT HAPPENED … but not Jason … oh I love him …. he lists off all the positions they did and said nothing too kinky which, unsurprisingly earns him a punch in the nose!  Hoyt points out that these things don’t just happen and that Jason chose to betray him and proceeds to beat the living daylights out of him and tells him he has something inside him missing.  Poor Jason doesn’t even try to fight back and just lays there and says he is sorry.

Back at Lafayette’s house Jesus is duct taped to a chair, bleeding onto a table, as he tries to reach Lafayette inside the possession….. and for one second it looks like he is making progress as we see Lafayette fight back and call Marnie a bitch which once she takes control back she is not amused with and threatens to “cut out his eyeball and feed it to him” ….. lovely…. yes that woman/ghost has totally lost the plot here ……and what does she want?  She wants Jesus’s Brujo magic … ALL OF IT … oh you know that’s not going to end well. Marnie goes off on a rant about how Jesus betrayed her and how the celebration of Samhein has become Halloween with fat kids stuffing their faces. Jesus tries to reason that what is inside him is seriously dark …. but sadly that serves Marnie well as she plans to fight Darkness with Darkness .. and then Marnie starts cutting Lafayette up and that’s all it takes to convince Jesus to do it.  He starts chanting and calling forth the creepy demon head that appears when he summons that darkness  but sadly to transfer it requires a great big knife in his chest.  Bye Jesus 😦 … Body count 1. .

Sookie takes a trip to Merlotte’s where Halloween is in full swing and Arlene is sporting a great zombie outfit as “Zombies are the new vampires’ … yes I have heard this before and ummm NOT A CHANCE IN HELL!!!! And Mr Ball DO NOT EVEN THINK about introducing zombies next season!!! It was bad enough with the necromancy and vamp bots ala Anita Blake THIS SEASON…. Anyway where was I … Oh yes Sookie goes to see Sam who doesn’t remember firing her (because of course it was Tommy in the Sam Suit that did the firing) and he blames Sookie for not turning up all week.  They decide to let everything go back to normal (YAWN) as long as Sookie can start work immediately…. in a bunny ear costume. Out in the bar we get to see Arlene’s kids in costume.  Coby is quite obviously some kind of alien / zombie and my first thought was that Lisa was a very pregnant Arlene … but turns out she was in fact a character from the MTV reality show Teen Mom’s 2 … yes well nobody ever claimed Arlene’s parenting skills were the best ……. Sam brings in little Emma to meet them and Arlene asks what she is and gets the honest truth …. a shapeshifter like my mommy or a werewolf like my daddy … but he’s dead.  Not much you can say to that so Arlene very wisely just leaves.

This is not the end of the Merlottes drama as an old “friend” of Terry’s from the War drops by.  At first I wasn’t sure he was actually there but turns out he is not in fact a ghost and Arlene gets to meet him and Terry looks more nervous than pleased to see him … hmmmmm wonder where that’s going.  Alcide is also at the bar trying to apologise to Sookie but ends up with more of a lecture about how people don’t really change they just find new ways to lie. He wants Sookie to change who she loves too but is interrupted by a strange phone call ….. hmmmm pack business??? nope no clues at this point … OK Alan Ball you got me with that one .. I don’t know where he is going ….

As evening falls Tara finds Jesus’s body and does her screaming thing before rushing off to find Sookie who is talking with Holly in full fairy dress up (because there ain’t nothing scary about fairies … Oh Holly … how little you really know)  and the “Bad feelings” that they are both having. Tara manages to convince them that Lafayette is possessed by Marnie and Eric and Bill are missing but luckily for them Holly has her wiccan first aid kit … Salt, Sage, and a lock of her aunt’s hair… so off they rush to the cemetery where Bill and Eric are chained to a funeral pyre with silver just waiting to burn.  This allows from some very amusing dialogue between Eric and Bill and as usual the bad guy (Marnie) has to explain her whole plot before starting the fire which gives time for Holly to set her Salt Circle.  With a quick Alien blast from Sookie Lafayette/Marnie is forced out of the circle and the intrepid 3 start chanting and calling forth all the ghosts from the graveyard including Antonia (who would not be in the graveyard IMO as she wasn’t buried there but whatever … Antonia puts the fire out so we will let her have that.  Antonia cannot however convince Marnie to hand over Lafayette’s body but Gran … yes GRAN sticks her ghostly hand in and yanks the bitch out and Marnie is still complaining because she feels she finally has power and doesn’t want to go. Antonia convinces her that they have won and it is time to move on .. So after much screaming and a few comforting words from Gran Marnie is ready to depart….but Gran finds time for a few lovely words with Sookie and then she is gone.  Sookie is reminded that there is still a whole lot of stuff going on with Tara cradling Lafayette begging him to be OK but it is Eric that amuses me with his comment ….”Excuse me … we are feeling a little crispy up here” lol … Love it Eric!!!

Unfortunately for Arlene all the ghosts raised at the cemetary don’t seem to have heard that they are meant to have gone back and she gets a surprise visit from Rene.  Has anyone else missed that accent *Sigh* ….. he was rather a lovely addition to the show so was great to see him back even in his ghostly form. Although does it strike anyone else as just a touch strange that he HAS his FAKE accent in death??? lol …. Anyway…. He tells Arlene that he still loves her but she is in danger as Terry’s ghosts are coming back to get him…. and then he is gone …..I am guessing we will learn more about that in season 5….Cliffhanger 1???

Skip from there to little red riding hood running through the forest ….. to Jason’s house who is bitching that he is not giving any candy to Trick or Treaters as he opens the door to find his biggest treat yet.  A very sexy looking Jessica that results in some very hot Jason / Jessica sex … about time we had some decent sex this season!!!  (side note … nice to see the whole eternal virgin thing isn’t bothering her anymore …. maybe she realised a little pain and pleasure is not a bad thing lol) Of course after they have the talk about how Jessica doesn’t want anything serious and how she is going out to feed but Jason seems kewl with it and proceeds to compare it to Pretty Woman … you know like a hooker without the kissing.  Oh Jason you are so dumb but you do amuse me no end and we are getting to see you naked again … always a bonus even though you are not really my type lol .

Over at Fangtasia Pam is having a mini meltdown after being sent away by Eric.  Still no news on what they are going to do about the curse … it’s looking more and more like we are just to assume that it is all fixed now (ANNOYING MR BALL!!!!…. I would even have accepted a “when Marnie died her spells died with her” cop-out but he didn’t even throw us that Grrrrrrrrr) …….. So Pam trashes the office and ends up getting comforted by Ginger (Who I must confess I thought may have been about to add to the body count but no …..)  Mr Ball you need to FIX this!!! Pam and Eric on the outs just does not work for me!

So from the trashing of Fangtastia to Eric and Bill feeding from Sookie’s wrists (one on each side).. Awwww how sweet *rolls eyes* and then we get Stupid Sookie raising her head again.  Suddenly she can’t stand it… she feels like she is being ripped in half (nice biblical analogy which Bill jumps on and says he only wants her to be happy … she can choose Eric if that will make her happy) … oh shut up Bill … we know you don’t mean that …. sneaky though … you get props for that! And so it is Eric’s turn …. Sookie turns expecting the same kind of offer from him but nope he goes with the See Bill says its OK come be with me defense *rolls eyes* …. oh Eric NOOOOOO…. we all know whats going to happen now …. Stupid Sookie is going to leave BOTH OF THEM!!! Oh get over yourself already!!!!!  So she leaves … and stands outside the door sobbing her poor broken little heart out … WHATEVER!!!!

Over at Lafayette’s he is broken-hearted over his killing poor Jesus but ghosts Jesus comes back to tell him that it’s all OK and that everything is temporary … hmmmmmm I am guessing that is going to mean something.  It’s very touching as Jesus says all he needs to do is just keep breathing and that he will never be far away.  Poor Lala 😦  He just doesn’t get it good for long does he…

And now … the last 15 minutes of the episode where EVERYTHING happens leaving so many questions for us to wait a YEAR to be answered …….

Whilst Lala is mourning Sam is mooning of Luna and things all seem very hunky dory there despite Sam being the cause of Emma’s dad dying … well yes technically Alcide killed him but we all know Sam started it lol ….. but they are at the not sleeping over stage so as Sam goes to leave, once Luna goes inside what should appear from the bushes … but a werewolf…. This has to be some kind of revenge attack from Marcus’s pack (see they blame Sam too lol) …. but thus leaves another cliffhanger .. I think that makes 2 lol….

Flashback to Jason’s house as Jessica leaves for the night leaving a very smiley Jason on the couch there is suddenly a knock at the door.  Jason believing himself to be irresistible thinking Jessica has come back but he opens the door to find …. STEVE NEWLIN …. WITH FANGS!!!! … What is going on here??? Cliffhanger 3!

Over in Shreveport we finally find out what Alcide’s mysterious phone call was about earlier …. it was from one of his contractors at a parking garage and he has obviously been glamoured as there is a BIG HOLE in the concrete floor … complete with broken silver chains and RUSSELL’S MUSIC … Oh Russell we have MISSED YOU!!!….. of course the big question as asked by the contractor is who would dig the hole suggesting that Russell did not in fact free himself.  Hmmmmmm I have a couple of theories both of which have massive holes in but I will share them anyway and I am sure I will be putting a lot more thought into this … Theory 1 …. Nan has gone mental ( As is shown in a minute and may think Russell is her best chance … flaw….. how did Nan know where he was?? Although Nan often seems to just “know things”) … Theory 2 … Pam went and dug him up hoping to deal with the whole Sookie thing (Flaw … It would seriously endanger Eric so not convinced about that either) … Ok Anyone else got any ideas??  Anyway whatever the reason that leaves us with cliffhanger 4 ……

Talking of Nan she is paying a visit to Bill and Eric complete with her “Gay Storm Troopers” (thanks Eric lol). So Nan comes to tell them that she has quit the authority and the AVL … well actually she got fired but according to her it’s the same difference.  Her last duty was supposed to be delivering the true death to Bill and Eric but she realises that she is next so instead she wants Eric and Bill to join her and he talks are going well until she announces that they all know about Sookie and then calls them puppy dogs …. and that’s all it takes for Eric to rip the heads off the 3 gay Storm Troopers and Bill to be able to use the element of surprise and Stake Nan ….. Death count add 4 lol … possible Cliffhanger 5 ….. what are Bill and Eric going to do now with execution warrants out for them ?????

And that brings us to the final scene of the night. Sookie coming home  and obviously something is wrong although she just keeps calling out for Tara .. .and she gets to see Debbie at the end of a shotgun….but before Debbie can shoot Sookie Tara dives and pushes her out the way and takes a shotgun blast right to the head.  Now forgive me for being a bitch here Sookie but this is YOUR FAULT!!! If you had stayed with Eric and bought him home with you he would have either A taken the shot for you or B disabled Debbie before she could shoot and Tara would not be involved!!!.  So poor Tara is on the floor brains literally spilling onto it (Sookie’s kitchen is not in general a good place to be!!) and Sookie rushes Debbie, get the shotgun and after only the briefest moment of hesitation blows Debbie’s brains out (Add 1 or 2 to the dead count depending on thoughts on Tara). So Debbie is dead, and Sookie is left cradling what’s left of Tara’s head screaming for help. Cliffhanger 6 …. is Tara really dead ….

Now Bill and Eric have both just ingested a large amount of Sookie’s blood so they should already be on their way over right having sensed her fear??? But I think the damage is too much even for a vampire to heal … literally her brains were on the floor …….. and ROLL CREDITS!!!

So to sum up … the main cliffhangers seems to be ……. Terry’s past coming back to haunt him ….Sam is about to face off with a werewolf … supposedly from Marcus’s pack???  Better shift Sam .. a LION would be good right about now lol……  Reverend Vampire and what he is up to with Jason ……. Who Dug Up Russell and what are his plans (Totally my favorite!!) ….. What will Bill and Eric Do now that they have rebelled against everything …..(siding with Russell sounds good to me lol) ……and finally is Tara actually dead???  She should be … shotgun to the head … brains all over the floor ….. but this is Alan Ball we are talking about and more than once he has been known to change the rules … who knows if Sookie discovers some magical healing fairy ability… or finds she has the ability to make one wish *rolls eyes* …. Yes I don’t like it either but this is Alan Ball remember…..

 

And so our wait for Season 5 begins …….. Season 4 was an interesting ride and I will certainly miss is on Sunday nights …… even when some episodes it seemed like all I wanted to do was complain lol.

 

Memorable Lines From And When I Die

 

Tara – “What are we like magnets for fucking craziness or something?”

Jesus – “You can’t trade Magic like fucking Pokemon cards”

Arlene – “Zombies are the new vampires” .. (hey I got told this at Spencers a few months ago ……unamused)

Alcide – “People don’t change … they just find new ways to lie”

Eric – “Excuse me … we are feeling a little crispy up here”

Pam – “I am so over Sookie and her precious fairy vagina and her unbelievably stupid name”

Eric – “Hi Nan …. and Gay Storm Troopers”

 

(M V””V).

 

 

True Blood Season 4 Ep 10 – Burning Down The House SPOILER Note V””V

Blog Originally Posted in Vampire Loving Dorks August 2011 – Reposting as Season 5 2012 Blogs will be here

RUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNN Sookie screamed as all hell broke loose at the end of last weeks episode and that’s right where this week picks up with Antonia/Marnie ordering her vamp-bots to KILL THE KING!!!!  Eric tries to rip Bill’s head off but Sookie distracts him by jumping on his back and in the time it takes Eric to throw her off Bill produces a gun with what I assume is silver bullets ….. I can only assume he planned on shooting the witches because Tara’s wooden bullet gun would have been more useful.  Bill shoots Eric (Much to Sookie’s dismay), and then 2 of the other vamp-bots.  Nan grants the true death to another vamp-bot with … A PENCIL!!! LMAO …. Sorry but that amused the hell out of me….. Sookie tries to reason with Eric but to no avail and with Bill being no match for Eric’s strength it looks like Bill is about to meet the true death at the end of a flagpole ….. but Sookie ZAPS him!!! Is it me or is she getting rather good at this zapping stuff????  Anyway her zapping Eric is like a power surge breaking the spell and flooding back all his memories …INCLUDING THE TIME THEY WERE TOGETHER 😀 … Oh this should be good!!!!  On the bad side Nan now knows that Sookie has powers, Antonia it appears is feeling guilty … and Nan goes into “Image mode” and lets all the injured humans know that help is on the way and she herself is a caring, certified helper … hmmmmmmmm yes OK Nan… you are a real girl scout!!

While chaos is being dealt with over at the tolerance rally Jason and Jessica are busy having a heart to heart in the back of Jason’s truck and Jason is racked with major guilt … to the extreme that he wants Jessica to glamour the memory out of him.  Hmmmm Jason I am not surprised Jessica leaves to go find someone to eat!

It’s drama all over as Alcide is rushing Tommy to the emergency room where apparently duct tape has become one of the treatment options lmao…. and I thought our local hospitals were bad!!!  Tommy on the other hand knows that something has gone seriously wrong between the skin-walking and the beating and it is not looking good.  “Shifter to Werewolf” he says he is dying and just wants to go back to Merlottes to pass there.  Alcide is not convinced until Tommy is hit by some weird bone cracking convulsions that have him puking lcopious amounts of blood all over the windscreen… and then its straight to Merlottes.

Over at the Moon Goddess headquarters the imprisoned witches are torn between the idiots playing with their cellphones “Magic is not stronger than technology” (Well obviously as non of your phones are working IT IS lol) … and then you have Holly who is convinced she along with Tara can undo the spell with their rage.   Antonia /Marnie return and all is not well in Marnie’s body…. bit more on that later.

Back at Vampire Headquarters (Also known as Vampire Bill’s Mansion) … Nan is not happy that Bill has been keeping the “little milkmaid’s lightening trick” a secret.  She has sent “Glamour squads” out all over Shreveport to wipe memories of what happened tonight but Bill has had enough and is finally going to take charge.  Oh he does have a backbone it appears as he finally stands up to Nan and tells her that they are going to take down the necromancer no matter what and she has no say in the matter.  Nan really doesn’t put up much of a fight because I think deep down she is all for the killing really lol.  Eric and Sookie are in the other room having a heart to heart because Eric remember’s everything but Sookie is now not sure as she says she loves both him and Bill.   Eric claims that she is his but Sookie says she never agreed to that .. hmmmmmmmmmm under my understanding of vampire law Sookie you slept with him … let him bite you … and willingly drank his blood … yes that pretty much means you agreed to be his and you have been in this world long enough to know that so stop claiming ignorance!!! Really .. what does everyone see in her *rolls eyes*  Eric on the other hand has no such problems and says he loves her.  Pam bursts in full of concern for Eric and is thrilled until she finds out that Sookie was responsible for breaking the curse and then just grudgingly thanks her.  There is a beautiful tender moment between Pam and Eric which vanishes as soon as Eric leaves the room and Pam is back to her snarkish self.  Bill announces they are going to war and they plan on blowing up Moon Goddess complete with Tara in it (which does not amuse Sookie) the next night and the plan is for Eric, Bill, Pam, and Jessica to go take care of it … hmmmmmmm lets see how well that works out!

Over at Merlotte’s Alcide has arrived with Tommy and Sam is there to greet them and his first thought is to get him some V but Alcide stops him explaining that Tommy has chosen.  Cue a very sweet scene I guess with them all talking about what happens when you die until Tommy says he doesn’t believe that shit he says he just wants to disappear but not be forgotten.  If you are a shifter fan then this is probably a tear-jerker of a scene …. it was well written and fairly moving but for a girl who cries at everything there were no tears for the loss of the shifter even as sad as Sam was.

Daytime strikes and Hoyt has come to visit Jason and ask to stay for a while.  He is not coping without Jessica there and is alternating between anger and tears and poor Jason just doesn’t know how to deal with this at all so he waits until Hoyt gets totally drunk and heads over to Sookie’s house to escape and asks he if can stay there for the night lol.  Sookie agrees but wants his help first as she goes off on a crazy rescue mission to the Moon Goddess headquarters.

Over  at the Bellefleur mansion Terry has found Andy’s stash of V and is planning on sorting it all out once and for all over at the Bellefleur fort.  Yes you read that right … the Bellefleur Fort which is a tree house / camp that they made when they were kids and apparently Terry lived there for a bit after the war. After much fighting and arguing and a very bad shooting contest Andy eventually realises that Terry is only trying to help him and agrees that he has messed up and is going to straighten up.  Terry is thrilled and says he is going to start right now … and leaves him to walk home.  Not sure how far it is but from Andy’s face it is not a short walk.

Back to the crazy rescue mission and Jason and Sookie have gone to pick up reinforcements in the guise of Lafayette and Jesus. Lafayette is not amused by any of this but after much grumbling in typical Lafayette styling they all agree to go.

At the Moon Goddess headquarters Holly and Tara are still trying to work on their spell to break down the defenses and you would think that Antonia/Marnie would notice but it appears she has her own problems.  In the back room to spirit leaves and we expect to find that Marnie has finally forced her out after last night’s blood shed but this is not the case.  Quite the opposite in fact … Marnie is loving the power and it is Antonia who is now not convinced that this violence is the way to go.  Well that is going to put a whole big dent in Jesus’s plan that Marnie is being used without her consent.  Marnie eventually convinces Antonia back into her body so that they can continue so it looks like Marnie is on a major power trip after years of being judged and picked upon for her beliefs she has finally got control and she is LOVING it!!!

Daytime over in vamp headquarters shows all our favorite vamps (and Bill) chained with silver and Nan is silvered down and handing out the true death to everyone …. True Death for Bill, True Death for Eric and True Death for Pam too …. yes not very threatening when she is all chained down.  Even Jessica is bored by it all and just wants to KILL something.  Nice to see Pam back to her snarky self although the spell should still be in effect but no one is mentioning it ….. Dr Ludwig’s fix was purely cosmetic … did Mr Ball forget that??? And what about the fact that she needed 6 injections a day???? Her supply is certainly not at Bill’s house but she is looking as sexy as ever … hmmmmmm sorry its bugging me … but back to the story ………

Jesus, Sookie, Jason and Lafayette are trying to get Jesus into Moon Goddess but Antonia as a very strong Stay Away spell in effect ….. think  invisible electric fence.  Antonia says that if Jesus can force his way through he can come in and calling on some demon power he manages to do it (Lafayette explains the demon head to Jason as a Latin thing lol).  So Jesus goes in and the other 3 stay hiding behind a car.

Over in Shreveport Marcus is trying to find Alcide and pays a visit to Debbie Slut .. I mean Pelt and it is pretty obvious that those 2 are about to jump into bed.  Damn animals!! They just need to learn to behave.  Shock collars anyone????  So Alcide is with Sam looking for Marcus at his garage and they are beating on anyone they find there (which is just one, not very intimidating wolf from the night before) and Marcus is at Alcide’s house making moves on Debbie … hmmmmmmmmm maybe some more were blood will be spilt soon 😀 … we can but hope.

Back at Moon Goddess Jesus is inside and has discovered that Antonia seems to be in control and that no one is going to be leaving … not even for a little while so he asks if he can speak to Marnie.  Antonia surprisingly agrees and Jesus is shocked to find that Marnie is actually happy with what is going on and is not under a forced possession as he had thought.  While all this is going on Jesus lets Sookie know that outside things have changed and Marnie is actually in control … at the same time Tara and Holly manage to get their spell to work and make a break for it and Marnie/Antonia along with Jesus running after them …. Sookie, Jason, and Lafayette come racing to meet them and Marnie/Antonia causes a huge flash of light and they all vanish except poor Jason who is left standing all alone outside wondering what the hell is going on. 

Night Falls and Eric, Bill, Pam and Jessica are all kitted out heading in a van for Moon Goddess.  They exit the van like a vampire hit squad all dressed in black and looking (apart from Bill) FANGTASTIC!!! Armed with what looks like a rocket launcher and they all walk in slow motion towards Moon Goddess and … AND THAT’S WHERE IT ENDS!!!!!!!!!  GRRRRR ALAN BALL!!! SUDDENLY YOU REMEMBER HOW TO DO A DECENT CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!

Overall I really enjoyed this episode .. its sad that it has taken this far through for things to be really taking off and now we only have 2 episodes left.  I still have a few questions like could they not find ANY other vamps to go help them????  Why did the combination of the skinwalking and the beating take such a toll on Tommy …… Alan Ball has been talking of major character deaths for the finale … is he counting Tommy as one???  Not many really stand out lines this week but a great script and I think possibly my fav so far apart from Eric and the crocodiles .. that was just so much fun but its good to have the REAL Eric back!

Memorable Lines From Burning Down The House

Jessica – “Fucking Humans!!! I’m gonna go find somebody to eat”

Alcide – “Few stitches, a little duct tap, a pretty nurse and you will be good to go”

Jason – Hoyt drank 11 of my beers, passed out and started farting ….. continuously!!!”

(M V””V).

True Blood Season 4 Ep 9 – Lets Get Out Of Here SPOILER Note V””V

Blog Originally Posted in Vampire Loving Dorks August 2011 – Reposting as Season 5 2012 Blogs will be here

So at the end of last week we were all left wondering if our little blonde heroine Sookie was going to live ….. well OK so not really … did ANYONE think she was going to die????  Sadly of course it had to be Bill that saved her yet again with his blood *sigh* … Alan Ball sure does love his Bill but yes Sookie is fine and more irritated at the fact that Eric is missing (much to Alcide’s annoyance) that worried that she almost died.

So where is Eric??? Well “The Blonde One” as Antonia insists on calling him is on remote control and has been taken him back to the Moon Goddess Layer much to the disgust of most of the coven members apart from Roy … Roy just thinks everything is amazing *rolls eyes*.  Tara has realised this is not what she signed up for and tries to reason with the crazy witch which works out really well as now they are all prisoners lol.  Well done Tara!!!

Over in the other part of town Sam is still at Luna’s and he convinces her that a camping trip so that they are just “not there” if Marcus comes back would be the best thing and Luna amazingly agrees.  The whole camping trip thing is actually pretty cute with Sam turning into a bunny so that Emma can pet a wild bunny was actually, as much as I hate to say it, rather cute!!  and it really works out for Sam as he finally gets laid!!! Yay go Sam!!! Just keep your shifter girlfriend away from the witches … looks what happened to your last one when there was magic in the air lol

Poor Jessica is totally heartbroken over what’s happened to her and has been spilling her heart out to Nan who responds with a very Pammish line about how she was so glad she was never a maker (See best lines for the whole quote).  This amused me no end …. but it got better because when Bill came home Nan announced she was going to spend the night there before they go to “The Festival of Tolerance” the next night …… and flash to a shot of them all laying on the beds silvered down and Nan’s snide comment .. is there anything ELSE I need to know.  LOVE IT!!!!

Poor Hoyt is waking up to an awful hangover and an even worse alarm on his phone.  A rooster crowing that loud even WITHOUT a hangover would be cause for the Advil!!!  Looking around his trashed house he decides to pack up all of Jess’s stuff and put it in “The Monster Box”.  This is going well under Lafayette/Mavis with baby Mikey and gun burst in and poor Hoyt gets run out of his own house minus his pants.  Hoyt contacts Jason who is busy with Andy taking a report from Arlene and Terry and we get to see that Andy is fast losing control over his V habit to the extent that he remembers to take that but forgets poor Hoyt’s pants.

While there is a crisis over at Hoyt’s house there is full on Slutty Sookie mode at Sookie’s … Eric’s??? Whose house are we calling it now lol.  Anyway this time Alan Ball makes no attempt to hide that it’s a dream sequence with Eric appearing at the door in the daytime and having a nice little make out session until Bill appears …. hmmmmmm Bill looks REALLY short compared to Eric lol … sorry I digress …. oooh am going to digress again … did anyone else notice the music playing????  Reminds me of the movie Sleepwalkers movie every time ….. ANYWAY …. so Bill, Eric and Sookie can now all hear each others thoughts and the men both want Sookie to be his but Sookie has other plans.  Now in the episode the dream sequence pops back and forth but I am going to put the whole thing in here because .. well it’s my review and I can.  So Slutty Sookie brings the 2 men into the living room and tells them that she is obviously in love with both of them and she makes it quite clear that she REALLY likes it ….. so gives them basically no other option that to both go for it … and of course they do … but we only get to see her get bitten by them both before she wakes up.   Hmmmmm wonder how inadequate Stephen Moyer felt in that scene *snigger*

Back at Hoyt’s Jason and Andy have arrived (minus pants for poor Hoyt) and Andy high on V has no intention of diffusing the situation and just busts down the door and nearly gets shot for his trouble.  Jason manages to get him out of there but no progress on rescuing the baby or finding out what the hell is going on.  Luckily Arlene has half a brain for a change and calls Jesus in to try to work this out.  When Jesus arrives there is a great scene with Terry trying to give a whole army directive speech to which Jesus says I am just a nurse!!! and in he goes. Jesus quickly realises that Lafayette is possessed by the spirit of Mavis and manages to make him/her see that she is a spirit by explaining she is in a man … and Mavis checks this out the only way a person can … by grabbing his privates.  Oh I know this was meant to be serious but that amused the hell outta me … yes yes I am a bad person …. I know … but it was FUNNY!!!!!  Well Jesus being the Bruha that he is does some magic and we discover that after the guy we say last week killed her baby he then killed her and buried her in the yard and all she wants to do is hold her baby one more time.  Jesus manages to get Lafayette?mavis to come out and give the baby to Arlene and Terry and Terry just tells Lafayette that its OK .. apparently in Terry’s world we all have days like that …. and he still loves him .. awwwwww.  To resolve poor Mavis’s tragic death Hoyt and Jason start digging under the tree and well lets say they have more faith that I would have done because those people dug right through into the night before they found anything and as I am sure you guessed they found the bones of Mavis and her baby.  Jesus tenderly places the baby’s bones in Mavis?Lafayette’s arms and then tells Mavis it is time to go.  Great scene with Mavis and the baby leaving but honestly for me the whole thing was like Jason and the Panthers … a little anticlimactic.  All this build up and speculation on my pat anyway about the Bellefleur’s being involved and I really thought with Andy being on the scene that would tie in but no …. it all just led up to that and now that story line is over. *Sigh*

From Sookie sluttiness to Debbie Pelt and she is not coping with Alcide helping out with Sookie (not that Alcide has fessed up but she could smell it … duh Alcide you really are dumb as a box of rocks lol).  So Debbie gets herself some V for courage and heads on over to Sookie’s to help (not shoot her as it first appeared … nice touch with the flowers behind the back Mr Ball ….. for us book readers I will let you have that one). Sookie checks and Debbie really does want to help (apparently) so the new best friends head on over to Moon Goddess to launch operation rescue Eric.

While Debbie is busy with Sookie, Alcide is over with Marcus who is just back from visiting “Shifter Sam’s brother” who was at the bar and left a message for Sam to come meet him that evening.  Yes we can all see the Skinwalker is about to strike again but this time is appears to be for the good :O … wow Tommy!!!.  Marcus asks Alcide to stick around as because he is 6ft 6 and wide as a barn he looks intimidating but Marcus swears that Alcide won’t have to hurt anyone.  Hmmmmm yes I didn’t believe it either and when Tommy shows up in his Sam suit claiming that Sam has never even laid a hand on Luna it looks as though he may be right … but then Tommy has to be Tommy and just keep on going and he tells Marcus how Sam’s brother has had Luna every way possible and that is the last straw and the wolves (except Alcide) all jump him and beat the living daylights out of him.  Well we all know what happens when shifters start to lose consciousness … they lose their shift and as a skinwalker it’s no different ….. poor wolves have no idea what to make of this but a furious Alcide calls Marcus a liar and picks Tommy up like he weighs nothing and walks off with him.

Back to operation “Rescue Eric” and Debbie appears to be helping as a distraction by revealing her werewolf self to Antonia who is not quite trusting but definitely curious.  While Debbie keeps Antonia busy, Sookie creeps in through the back and finds Eric who even spellbound recognises her and is able to tell her to leave and that the plan is to kill the king.  Debbie at this point tells Antonia that she bought her Sookie and it’s not clear whether she is really trying to help or not as it’s definitely ends up helping.  Tara finds Sookie first and actually does something smart for a change and has Sookie use her telepathy to help her escape, and lets her know where Bill is going to be and that all the people there are being held hostage.  Sookie escapes and catches up to Debbie in the car and turns her into Taxi service.  While Sookie and Debbie race to the hotel Antonia leaves too taking Eric and Roy with her but leaving the others trapped in a magically sealed building.  Cue the stupidest scene of the night …. Tara grabs a door handle and gets severely burnt for her efforts and what is the big plan …. GO TRY THE BACK DOOR … cue another screaming wiccan as she gets burned too. Hmmmmm yes because it was likely that Antonia would only booby trap one door wasn’t it.

While Bill is at his Tolerance Rally waiting for Eric to come kill him *snigger*, Jessica is at home all alone and gets a surprise visit from Jason who on behalf of Hoyt it bringing her stuff back.  Jason has sweetly crossed out “the monster” message on the side before returning them and as he puts it “parrot phrases” Hoyt’s message for her into something much nicer.  While agreeing it’s a bad idea to come in Jason says nothing about Jessica coming out … to have crazy hot sex in the back of Jason’s pick up truck.  Oh I do feel sorry for Hoyt but damn Jessica and Jason is a hot couple if you ask me!!!

Over at the Vampire Tolerance Rally the vampires are trying to say how lovely and harmless they are and all is going well until Eric goes in chased by 3 vampire guards who immediately get the remote control treatment from Antonia and off they go to kill three human guards, eviscerate them, and then hang them dramatically over the balcony to ensure maximum chaos below.  Bet Nan is just wishing for the days of Russell now!!!! ….. As this happens Sookie comes rushing in screaming for bill and interrupting his (very boring) speech about how hate always provokes a bigger response than peace blah blah blah …. and the episode ends with Eric rushing forward to Kill Bill …. and Sookie screaming RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Over a maddened crowd.

Over all Mr Ball a much better attempt than in previous weeks if you ask me but I have to ask … where was Pam???  Does anyone really believe she would not have been out there leading the search party for Eric??? She never came to see if he was with Sookie???? She never even called to check :S …. I really missed Pam this week and I think her absence for me at least was glaring.  With only 3 Episodes left I am already beginning to mourn lol

Memorable Lines From Let’s Get Out Of Here

Bill – “We Can Pray” …. Alcide -” A Vampire and A Werewolf who’s going to listen?”

Emma – “I hope I turn out to be a shifter … So I can be a bunny and pet myself”

Nan – “There have been times I will admit that I have thought maybe I should put my career on hold and become a maker but those last few hours with you have erased all those doubts … FOREVER!!!”

Tommy – “Well He Ain’t around Marcus He Knows Who I Am”

Mavis /Lafayette – “Oh No … how I make the baby with this me”

Sookie – “Come on Debbie … I have to say for a werewolf you drive like a girl”

(M V””V).

True Blood Season 4 Ep 7 – Cold Grey Light of Dawn SPOILER Note V””V

Blog Originally Posted in Vampire Loving Dorks  August 2011 – Reposting as Season 5 2012 Blogs will be here

So after last weeks episode ending with some interesting batches of action this weeks episode had a much slower almost fill in the gaps informative trend.

We start by seeing that Antonia has now totally taken over Marnie and she starts by having the traitor Katie killed when she comes to see what’s going on ….  but with no blood….. and then Antonia sends the guard off with a message for the king that sheeeessss baaaaackkkk (poltergeist anyone??? lol)

Next we skip over to where Pam has Tara and girlfriend totally trapped and is obviously about to kill both of them with no problems at all until a group of tourists turn up complete with video to ruin Pam’s plan.  They then have some debate over the fact that Pam may or not be a zombie much to Pam’s disgust and she has to settle for the threat that she will come and find Tara be it 10 minutes or whenever ….She is coming.

Flash over to Lafayette, Jesus, and crazy grandpa who claims he only wants to help.  Yup feel free to throw poisonous snakes at me anytime :S not!!

Back in Shreveport a totally ecstatic Debbie and a somewhat reluctant Alcide get initiated into the new pack.  This is obviously not going to be a happy night as Debbie agrees they can spend 5 minutes looking for Sookie just to make sure she’s safe …. and they find her safe alright … safe and sounds and nakedly linked with Eric lol so they tactfully head home where later in bed this causes some bedroom problems for Alcide and Debbie … awwwwwwww and they made such a great couple too :S ……I am sure it won’t be too long before Debbie is getting her satisfaction from the new creepy packmaster.

Necromancer controlled crazy vamp tries unsuccessfully to kill King Bill and unfortunately for him ends up as a pile of dust (what no exploding goo? ….. maybe something to do with the “resurrection” final words …. maybe he was now a zombie while controlled by her???)

Jason gets an unexpected visit from who he obviously expects to be Jessica but it turns out to be Hoyt who has obviously got some kind of clue that all his not happy in Jason land.  Claiming to be worried about Jason’s state of mind the talk starts with Jason’s problems but they drift over to the fact that all is not well with Hoyt and Jason and that Hoyt will do anything not to hurt Jessica because he needs her ..awwwwww

King Bill in the meantime is trying to explain to Jessica how dangerous this Antonia is and how she can make vampires walk out into the sun against their bidding.  Bill decides that all vampires need to be chained in silver when they go to ground.  Whilst they are not happy about it non of the other vamp sheriffs seem to have a better idea.

Nice break from the whole vamp drama for some naked Sookie and Eric action which has moved itself into the house and then we see them laying peacefully in the bed when Sookie realises she left her clothes in the woods … not that anyone seems to worried about that. This leads to a lovely discussion about ow Eric is worried Sookie won’t still want him when he gets his memories back because he will be so different again.  Sookie is hoping he will remember some of how he is now because she is obviously totally smitten with this Eric … oooohhhhh how will this all end u lol

Pam in the meantime is getting some treatment from Dr Ludwig.  It takes face and body peeling to a whole other level.  She explains that she is not a witch so cannot remove the curse but can remove the rotten outter skin and provide injections that will at least give her the appearance of the beauty that she had before.  Hmmmmmmmmmmm Pam looked as about as impressed as I would be lol

Sam has Tommy at the hospital getting treatment for what happened and at that point Sam is still on Tommy’s side.  This doesn’t last too long as Sam realises what exactly Tommy had ended up doing and yet again disowns him and throws him out on his own (hmmmm recurring pattern here)

King Bill brings over lots of silver chains to restrain Eric during the day to keep him “safe” from the sun and explains that all the vampires will be doing the same thing. Now here is my problem with this .. they are just draping the chains over the vamps … did it not occur to anyone to tie them down somehow???  Take a trip to the Home Depot and get a few locks to fix them to things??? They manages to work that out when they wanted to tie Russell to a pole??? Just my thought …….

Anyway while Eric gets his sleeping lesson from Bill Marnie/Antonia is out trying to convince Tara to join her band of crazy witch people which seems to be going pretty well.

So poor Jessica is getting chained … any idea why it has to be on naked skin??? Surely they could be just as effective over their clothes??? Do they have to be in pain??? Bill decides due to Jessica’s pain that they have enough chains on her .. they might regret that methinks ……

Pam is in her pretty pink lined coffin already looking slightly better as Ginger administers the healing injections and then covers her completely with a silver net and Eric is in Sookie’s Hidey Hole getting his chains lovingly places over him by Sookie … again no one seems to be tying any of them down…. must be reserved for King Bill and his matyrdom … note NEVER get stuck in Bill’s Kindom!!!

Tara and Antonia and anyone else they have gathered together go to the store and prepare for their magic to begin.

While that is going on, Jessica and Bill discuss love and how Hoyt and her are not working out. All the time suffering from the bleeds.  Jessica can’t understand why they don’t just go and kill this Antonia before it goes any further and decides that if they survive the day she will eat the witches face off.

It is after midday and Eric wants free and there are some soppy sentiments exchanged between Sookie and Eric and you can see how much Sookie has come to love him in such a short time and she will do anything to save him.  And Eric decides he doesn’t really want his memories back.  He thinks he will be quite happy how he is with her.

Meanwhile things are getting weird in Merlottes.  holly is having a weird kind of date with Andy (who is suffering from V withdrawal) and in the kitchen Lafayette is seeing the strange black woman who seems to be hovering around Arlene’s psycho baby… wonder when we are going to find out what is up with her and her pretty singing.

So Marnie/Antonia finally calls all her witches together and they start chanting away and Antonia floats up from the floor and the winds start to blow and you just know that things aren’t good.  Jason is over at Sookie’s house when it starts and whilst his first thoughts are of helping Eric he soon realises Jessica is just across the way.

All the vampires start going totally insane screaming about the sun and one of Maxine’s neighbours obviously didn’t get the message about the silver and she walks right on out into the sun to Maxine’s comment of I KNEW IT! lol

Jessica breaks free of her chains … oh good job Bill … and grabs the keys from one of the human guards and gets free and heads  for the front door.  All the time we see Jason running at full speed across the graveyard towards bill’s house knocking guards out-of-the-way as he does so …… with beautiful church music playing she throws open the front door and is flooded with the pure white  deadly rays of the sun ….. AND THEN IT ENDS!!! … Do you think this is it for poor young Jessica or will Jason get to her in time.  She is a baby vamp and so should take a while to burn if they stick to their own storylines …. Oh next Sunday needs to hurry up!!!!!!!

 

Memorable Lines From Cold Grey Light Of Dawn

Pam – “I am not a zombie!!!” – Tourist – “that’s is exactly what a zombie would say!!!”

Eric – “Once I know who I am – Everything I have done – I couldn’t possibly  be the same”

DR Ludwig – “I can make you look pretty again …. well at least how you looked before whatever that was”.

Jessica – “When we survive the day, I’m going to eat that fucking witch … starting with her face!!”.

(M V””V)

True Blood Season 4 Ep 6 – I Wish I Was The Moon SPOILER Note V””V

Blog Originally Posted in Vampire Loving Dorks June 2011 – Reposting as Season 5 2012 Blogs will be here

Sooooooo before I start my review of last night’s episode I feel that I have to give full props to my husband Greg who actually caught something BEFORE I did. I am so proud of him …..He is now officially a True Blood Addict lol.  Right at the beginning of last night’s show where they showed the flashback to Luna and the Skin Walkers lesson he said Tommy is going to be able to be a skin walker … he killed both his parents…. and He was SOOOOOOO RIGHT!!!!! So irritated that I didn’t pick up on that LAST WEEK when it happened … I must be off my game …. but anyway full credit to Greg …. and now on with the show …….

As I am sure you all remember Pam blabbed (Still irritated and claim that would never happen) … and Bill was rushing over to play cockblocker and ruin the wonderful moment Eric and Sookie were having *sigh*.  As expected Bill rushes in and it is almost worth the interruption to watch Eric get all fangy and throw the evil King Bill across the room.  Just more evidence of how Bill would never really survive as King without the whole authority interference!!!.  Unfortunately Sookie reminds Eric that Bill is actually his king and we see a real resurgence of Amnesia Eric complete with being on bended knee calling Bill “My Liege” and poor Eric willingly goes off to vampire jail with Sookie trailing after them begging Bill to let him go.

Well King Bill is riding high on his major power trip and not only has Sookie thrown out of his house but says that they are to call the police on her if she ever comes back. To top it off as soon as she leaves he has a little conference with Nan and explains that he has both the necromancer (Marnie) and Eric in custody and claims Eric is infected and therefore a danger to them all and needs to be dealt with by (you guessed it) receiving the True Death.  Whilst Nan doesn’t look to happy about this she does agree to put it to the authority and makes a little dig at how upset Bill isn’t about all of this.

Down in the vampire jail Eric complains that it smells like death and we get to see he has been placed in the same cell as Pam who continues to slowly rot and is extremely pissed about the whole matter.  Eric sadly is still in amnesia land and actually sticks up for Bill pointing out that Pam is committing treason with the things she is saying.  Pam tries her best to get Eric to “snap out of it” and remember who he was but Eric is having none of it.  He LIKES this newer version of himself (probably because he is finally looking to be able to get into Sookie’s pants lol) and claims that he doesn’t want to remember all the bad things he has done.

Bill gets his warrant of execution and out comes Eric on his knees in front of Bill willing and ready to meet the end as his king sees fit.  With a beautiful speech that gets Bill to free Pam and a heartbreaking monologue about how Sookie has shown him what love is and he will be forever grateful as he meets the true death.  It’s so touching that even Bill looks confused …. but he turns around and raises the stake anyway ………..

Moving over to the other side of town Arlene and Terry wake up in time to avoid burning to death from the fire that started all by itself but as they are getting all the kids out they realise they can’t find Mikey.  That little baby is nowhere to be found.  Terry eventually drags Arlene outside just before the house explodes only to find that baby Mikey is out on the lawn with the creepy doll.  No one has any idea how he got there but when Arlene picks him up he see’s a strange black lady in a dated dress waving at him and the crazy baby waves back.  Hmmmmmmmm obviously she is connected to the doll but other than that wtf :S.

Talking of crazy while Sam is over trying to sort out the mess at Arlene’s place he calls Tommy (who is not coping well with the double murder he committed) and asks him to go open the bar for him.  After they get off the phone Tommy does some creaming at himself in the mirror and starts smacking himself about his head and suddenly HE SHIFTS INTO SAM!!!  Now of course any normal person (shifter?) would probably call their brother freaking out as to what is going on …. but not Tommy.  Tommy decides he is going to spend the day in a Sam suit.  First stop Merlotte’s where he fires Sookie telling her that he doesn’t understand why everyone puts up with her anyway (You would think that seeing as Sookie can tell something is wrong now might be a good idea to use that little gift of hers) and off rushes Sookie all upset.  Next in the bar he tries to be nice to Maxine but all he gets to hear is how awful he (Tommy) is (well what did he expect after how he treated her) so now he’s upset and when Luna comes around to play with Sam he decides that seems like a very good idea and so sleeps with her. Hmmmmm not sure how she is going to feel about that when she finds out especially as Tommy basically just throws her out afterwards.   As Luna leaves Tommy shifts back into himself and gets really sick and thats where Sam finds him a few hours later passed out on the floor in puke.

With Sookie not having to work she goes off in pursuit of Jason to help with his little problem and finds him handcuffed to the bed.  Jason working with his normal brain capacity hadn’t worked out that once he shifted the handcuffs would be no good.  So uncuffed they sit out front until Jason sends Sookie in to get a couple of beers and when she returns she finds just Jason’s shirt on the ground leading us all to think that he has shifted and Sookie takes off after him in to the woods.  Must be a pretty small set of woods as Sookie runs into Debbie and Alcide who are on their way to a pack meeting (Yes Debbie wants to be part of the pack …. surprise surprise … how long till she tries to sleep with that packmaster do we think??) and Sookie gets a quick lesson on how shifters cannot be made only born.  So let’s get this straight … we have had 5 weeks of story leading up to Jason being a Werepanther only for him not to be a Werepanther …. well that was worth it …… actually with Jessica and Jason now being linked it kinda was worth it.  She was totally adorable feeling his fear and coming rushing through the woods to save him only to find out what the problem was and then just sit and comfort him.  They both know that although nothing happened “something” is going on so they agree not to tell Hoyt.  Poor Hoyt I do feel sorry for him but how cute were Jason and Jessica .. I mean really!!!!!

Down in Mexico Lafayette and Jesus are dealing with the crazy grandfather issue.  Very little happens this week with them other than the grandfather setting Jesus up to be bitten by a rattlesnake and leaving him to die with Lafayette who somehow draws power from an unknown source to save him.  I think this is one of those examples of too many storylines and not enough time.  They crammed this in because obviously its important but not enough time to develop and sink your teeth into it.

Same can be said for the whole Tara thing.  Naomi has come up to find her and blah blah blah is willing to forgive her but the only really interesting but was when Pam came looking for Tara at the end.  Was nice to see Pam back to her snarky self telling the dykes not to worry as there was plenty of her to go around as she rushes to attack them …… and again we will see what happens next week!

Marnie is still trapped in vampire jail and is trying over and over to connect with the spirit that has caused her all the problems to start with.  She eventually makes contact and we get to see a big history lesson as to how why the spirit is so mad about vampires and it looks like she has completely taken over Marnie’s body now and the vampires could be in trouble as she turns one of her jailers (who happens to have been at the possessed spirits original burning … what are the odds) into a zombie (and not just in the Pam rotting style) …. oh next week should be GOOD!!!!!.

But before we can get there poor little Sookie was still running lost in the woods hunting for her brother but instead she finds … ERIC!!!!!!!!!!! And FINALLY there is no one around to stop them!!!!  It may not be in the shower but we got to see some naked Sookie and Eric in the moonlight and oh it was so worth the wait!!!!! Of Course Alan Ball has to give us Bill’s perspective too and it shows him on the porch all alone with his drink looking sad … awwwwwwwwwww  NOT!!!! Get off the screen and let us see more Eric and Sookie!!!!!!

Oh I Can’t Wait For Next Sunday ………

 

Memorable Lines From I Wish I Was The Moon.

 

Pam – “He’s a self-loathing, power-hungry pompous little dork and you hate his guts … You are a Viking god. You bow to no one.”.

Eric – “Tell Sookie I was born the night she found me, because of her I went to my true death knowing what it means to love. Tell her, ‘thank you.'”

Bill – “Believe it or not, your entire existence does not revolve around what or who is between your legs.”

Jason – What the hell did you think that meant … clean my kitty litter???.”

Maxine – “Boy’s dumber than a bucket of spit, and just as useful”

 

(M V””V).

True Blood Season 4 Ep 5 – Me and the Devil SPOILER Note V””V

Blog Originally Posted in Vampire Loving Dorks June 2011 – Reposting as Season 5 2012 Blogs will be here

 

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo did everyone enjoy episode 5?  If you loved it all then you might not want to read this because lets just say I am NOT a happy bunny!!!!

Well I am going to start this review with a combination of the beginning and the end because that’s what has got my kickers all in a knot!!!  As you may remember at the end of the last episode Pam got cursed by the possessed Marnie and her face started to disintegrate.  We find out this episode that she is slowly starting to rot and she starts wearing this Miss Havershamesque big black hat and veil (not too shabby IMO lol).  During the episode Bill and his merry band of goons help Pam capture Marnie and they put her in a cell and question her (eventually big bad King Bill goes in and glamours her and they realise she really doesn’t know how to reverse the spell).  OK So far so OK with the whole storyline so lets slip to the final part of the whole Pam fiasco …… at the end she is in a meeting with Bill and 4 other Louisiana Sheriffs discussing what was to be done … and PAM LETS SLIP THAT SHE KNOWS WHAT HAPPENED TO ERIC …. and EVEN WORSE …. WHERE HE IS HIDING!!!!!!……. SO WRONG!!!! This is just TERRIBLE writing!!!! Have these writers not met this character before??? Even going purely on the TV show version and ignoring all references to her book persona do they not remember the Magister events in Season 3???  PAM WOULD NEVER betray Eric like that … NEVER!!!!! …….Oooooohhhhh this has made me  really REALLY mad …. so mad that even the next part of the review doesn’t really help things ….. but it does a bit lol …. Ok takes deep breath …..

So what we all have been waiting for … the whole Sookie / Eric connection.  Well some progress is finally made this week despite a very strange Eric /Godric dream where Godric encourages Eric to drain her dry.  After the dream there are some very tender moments and lovely handholding and its all really sweet.  Right towards the end of the episode we finally (almost) get what we have been waiting for .. Eric and Sookie full on non dream make out kiss!!!!  Just as things start to get good though they flash over to where Bill and the gang are having their meeting and ends with Bill about to rush over and ruin everything at Sookie *sigh* when are they going to leave these two alone so they can finally GET IN THE SHOWER!!!

OK on the other storylines that to be honest I couldn’t really care less about ….. Tara, Lafayette, and Jesus are all taking off.  Tara is heading back to N’Orleans to face a not happy girlfriend who has discovered she is not really Toni.  Hmmmmmmmmmmmm is it too much to hope Tara stays there???  Lafayette and Jesus are off to Mexico to visit Jesus’s crazy Brujo grandfather who Jesus hasn’t seen since he was 9 and from a flashback we learn he made Jesus slaughter a goat and drink some blood to take in the power and his mother whisked them away. (Yup sounds like a great place to visit)

Arlene and Terry decide they need an exorcism so Reverend Daniels (who is now married to Lettae Mae who comes with him) comes over to sing and dance and wave white sage everywhere.  They eventually proclaim the place clean and apparently that’s all it takes to get Arlene and Terry back in bed in nasty tacky white satin sheets.  Cue very creepy music to let us all know that all is not well …. and a packet of matches catches fire by itself on the dresser … wonder how long it will take them to notice that???

Finally in the trio of storylines I couldn’t care less about are the Mickens.   Last week the evil parents from hell finally captured Tommy (although I still haven’t worked out why he just didn’t shift) but they have him and are obviously planning on making him fight the next day.  Long story short there is a big fight and Tommy finally kills Jo Lee but unfortunately also kills Melinda (who in Tommy’s defense was trying to help Jo Lee) but it is clear that Tommy never meant to do that and he is devastated.  Now who do you go to when you kill your parents?? Your brother of course lol  Sam comes to the rescue and after a brief, hilarious, incident with Andy Bellefleur (He opens the truck with Tommy and the bodies in the back and gets greeted by tommy having turned into a gator!!! … wow finally some smart thinking from the shifter).  So Sam and Tommy take the bodies and throw them in the swamp and Sam adds marshmallows to tempt the gators up to destroy them … because apparently Gators love marshmallows :S

In other news from the town…Sookie goes to get a reading from Marnie and gets a message from Gran telling her that Marnie is evil and she needs to RUN RUN RUN .. which she does … hmmmmmm interesting use of her mind reading skills …. Alcide gets a visit from a very unthreatening looking Shreveport packmaster who is unhappy that Alcide is on his turf and hasn’t presented himself to him (Yawn .. they could have at least got a big scary packmaster) ….. oh and there then is Jason …..

Jason as we know last week got free from the crazy hotshot freaks and was eventually saved by Jessica giving him her blood.  Jessica and Hoyt are acting all weird a fact that Hoyt feels is appropriate to try to talk about with Jason while he is spilling his guts about the terrible violations that he has endured… well timing never has been Hoyt’s strong point but it was funny to see it almost as a turn around as its normally Jason interrupting with completely random Jason stuff lol.  As usual anyone that ingests a large amount of blood for healing gets the pleasure of some nice dirty dreams and Jason is no exception.  You would think after what had happened to him he would be all about giving the sex a miss for a while but he certainly seems to enjoy his Jessica style wet dream …. that is until Hoyt interrupts and then eventually takes over.  Definitely a scene of much amusement for me.

And that pretty much covers it all from my view.  I am really hoping they get to some shower action soon …. this season so far is seriously lacking in any decent vamp porn!!!!  I must say though that the previews from next week look more about saving Eric from Bill administering the true death.  Just another example of King Bill NOT being kewl!!!!!

Memorable Lines From Me and The Devil

Eric -“I would never hurt anyone as beautiful as you”

Pam – “I can put up with a lot but if you fuck with my face its time to die … and I would like permission to torture the kill the mousey little bitch that cast the spell”

Sam – “Gators love marshmallows .. you should know that”

Jason – “maybe God is punishing me for having too much sex .. he’s like you know (in awesome Jason God voice) Jason Stackhouse you have fucked too many hot women… now lets see how you like it!”

Soooooo what did you think????

(M V””V)