Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season …. and here I am again so let the spoilers and snarking begin! For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )… let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated. I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me. My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!
Wow only 3 episodes left including this one. AHHHHHHH As much as this season is continuing with the “filler episodes” (seriously you are pretty much running out of time here … LITERALLY) I am still so sad this this is ending. I have the feeling that the finale is going to kick some major ass and I will just be yelling obscenities at the screen for several minutes :(. On the plus side there were ZERO shifter mentions / issues/ references this week 😀 So that is something to celebrate lol.
Right then everybody ready because here we go! Again this week can be split up into just a few little boxes as other than a couple of proper plot points this week was just full of things that are (I hope) going to go somewhere. We start with Sarah or “Numi” at the camp knowing they are all outside waiting to kill her. She is talking to her imaginary Jason and he agrees that it is time to die. Out she goes ready to take on death and claiming that she will come back as “The Princess Of Peace” … ummmm OK crazy bitch …. and Eric almost delivers it to her (seriously lets blame the Hep V for addling his brain THIS much …. I mean DRINK FIRST …. Cure … remember???) but Pam grabs one of the guns armed with a wooden bullet and threatens to kill herself if he doesn’t cure himself and hand her over. Thankfully he does and we get a shot of the powerful Eric yelling at the sky with some overly ridiculous long fans but hey … HE IS CURED!!!!! Wooooo Hooooo!!!! And Sarah is tossed to the floor to be swept up by the corporation and the opening credits roll!
One of the main stories this episode is Sookie still desperate to save Bill. We see them relaxing (and we see way too much of Bill and his nasty veins) and they are chatting about the past. Boring boring boring! Was this meant to be a recap for us? Because those of us that watch a lot know this … and we also don’t care. The only possibly relevant part of this conversation could be that Sophie Ann wanted to breed Sookie. That is 2 baby references in regard to Bill in 2 weeks …. plus we think we are going to get through the whole episode with out a “Bill Flashback” and technically I suppose we do because the one they show 5 minutes from the end turns out to be Sookie and not Caroline holding a baby … which is not a baby but a bundle of darkness. Hmmmmmm I assume there is a reason for this but I have no idea what it is and I am not really sure that as Bill is involved I actually care.
Perhaps the most annoying (and pointless time filling crap) this episode is the whole Tara chapter which does at least finally gets closed once and for all. Lafayette and Lettie Mae are still digging random holes in their old houses’s garden (while the confused family just stand there and look on …… I am assuming at this point if you live in Bon Temps pretty much anything goes???). The Reverend comes along to try and talk them out of doing anymore but instead gets convinced to join them on the V trip and James turns up and supplies the blood. I adore James! I wish they were doing more with his character this season!!!! He seems to have been relegated to V supplier :(. Anyway ….. whole bunch of time spent with the Lala, Lettie Mae and the Rev high as kites and following Tara through a pointless flashback to an old birthday where we learn that Lettie Mae was abused by Tara’s dad. He freaked out because he couldn’t find his gun (turns out Tara had hidden it) …. Tara has the opportunity to shoot him but doesn’t and she buries the gun in the back yard and he leaves them forever. That is what they are hunting for. The gun. OK ANYONE have any guesses as to why of ALL the things they could have come up with THIS was the storyline they went with. UGH YAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gun found Tara and her mom say goodbye and she heads off and is supposedly at peace now. WASTE OF SCREEN TIME!!!!!
In more exciting news Jason is over at the Fortenberry house with Hoyt and Bridget as they sort through all the things and there is a fair amount of tension going on especially as Bridget mentions having babies. Hoyt is not in a “baby” place and apparently doesn’t know if he ever will be. Poor Jason is just sitting there when he gets a text, complete with pictures, showing that Violet has Adelyn and Jessica all tied up and telling him he needs to come. Obviously he rushes straight to the car but there is a problem…. Bridget doesn’t want to stay and fight with Hoyt so she gets in the car too. Hmmmmm weird!!! Jason calls Andy but he is too far out so he is rushing to the rescue … and apparently Bridget is going with them because she won’t get out the car!
Jason leaves Bridget in the car with a gun full of Silver bullets (which is not too thrilled about but hey she was the one that insisted on going …. at least she didn’t insist on going INTO the house). As Jason explores there is some beautiful music playing (I need to track this down!) and he is jumping at all the statues placed everywhere as if Violet doesn’t already know that he has arrived lol. She of course pounces on him and he doesn’t stand a chance and before he knows it he is he is gagged and restrained and learning about the fates that are about to end all the prisoners, described in glorious detail as Violet swans around a room she clearly loves and has used many times in the past.
Wade is going to have all his fingers crushed and then his head crushed in a vice while Adelyn watches. Next will be Adelyn who will get to experience this awful claw looking device called “The Breast Ripper” which will be heated up and then literally grasp and tear all the flesh from her chest and the she will slowly drain her dry. Jessica will be next and Violet correctly works out that Jessica was a virgin where she was turned and so her punishment will be to be fucked by a red hot metal dildo every 10 minutes for days. Wow … Violet really isn’t happy! Before we can find out what fate was in store for Jason, Violet tells us was that all she wanted was for Jason to worship her for the perfect creature that she was …. and then Hoyt appears and shoots her in the back and it is bye bye Violet. Another abrupt ending with a lot less drama than hoped for :(.
So Violet is dead, Hoyt is the hero and the prisoners are safe. You can see Jessica looking at him in a whole new light again. Bridget is sitting with Jason and Hoyt and Jessica are chatting and there are just sparks everywhere. I wonder if they will unglamour Hoyt somehow. Hmmmmmm This could get interesting but they need to hurry up! There are only 2 episodes to sort this out!! Damn you HBO! Andy and Holly arrive and are thrilled that Hoyt saved the day. Yay … Go Hoyt!! It is shame that he won’t know that he killed the vampire that killed his mother. I hope he gets to find this out ..especially with them having preached the whole “circle of everything” …. although then he would know that Maxine had definitely gone to the dark side and in that moment Violet was the good guy ….. kinda …. fun that it is all so mixed up! Sometimes True Blood can make things interesting after all :D.
Later we see Hoyt head to the Compton mansion and he is starting to leave Jessica a note and a brown bag (ummmm this all looks rather familiar ………) when Jessica hears him and invites him in. In the bag is some of his blood that he had drained at the clinic because he is “clean” and thought it would help with Bill. Awwwww now if we could just fix that pesky glamour issue ……. He says that him and Bridget will be around for a couple of days before they leave back for Alaska and we all know in the True Blood world that leaves time for ANYTHING to happen :D… and I am sure it will!
The third and final main plot line this week is that now they have Sarah they are going to synthesize her blood and create New Blood (Nu Blood?) to cure everyone. Eric and Pam are wondering what the delay is and they get a little lesson in how this business is going to work. Turns out it only took a couple of hours to synthesize and perfectly replicate Sarah’s blood. The thing is they don’t want it perfect. If it is perfect then everyone will be cured and that doesn’t create a “Demand and Supply” cycle. We learn that Gilette COULD produce a razor that would never dull …. but they don’t ….. Energizer could make an everlasting battery … but they don’t. What they want to create is something that will keep them healthy as long as they are drinking the product and urges Pam and Eric to just stay quiet about it.
As Pam and Eric do love their money this is not as issue at first ….. but Eric just HAS to go and let Sookie know that he is OK now *sigh* and you know what that means! Yep she sees that he is cured and she wants the same for Bill! UGH!!! Even worse you can see that Eric wants to give it to her …. but he can’t. He tells her that dawn is coming and he will return the following night with answers and takes off into the sky leaving a very frustrated Sookie standing in the doorway.
Well we all know Sookie isn’t going to wait …. especially as she doesn’t believe that Bill may HAVE until the following evening and so she comes up with a plan and that plan involves jumping in her truck and driving out to Fangtasia. Yes AWESOME plan Sookie! She is greeted by the Yokomoto guards and she convinces them that she needs to see Eric Northman but that does not go down well overall. Luckily she is smart enough not to argue when Eric calls her a Fangbanger and pretends to glamour her. She does overhear cowboy leaders thoughts that he hopes that they are not betraying him and something seems off and she also hears that the cure is in the basement. She goes through her little pretending routine (with a series of absolutely ridiculously over exaggerated nods and head shakes) and leaves Fangtastia but only to drive as far as the back entrance where she sneaks back in and find Sarah in the basement. Finally she does something smart and leaves Sarah but we all know when she leaves she plans on returning that night with Bill to fix him!
Night falls and cowboy boss is not feeling too trusting and tells Eric and Pam he is going out and suggests they stay in the club … with some of his guards. They don’t object but we soon see them heading down to Sarah and Pam quite rightly points out that they are going to do something stupid aren’t they! Love Pam! Strangely the guards don’t seem to be interested in anything they are doing unless they are trying to leave (or I assume leave with Sarah) so they get to visit alone. As they are deciding exactly what to do Sookie arrives back with Jessica helping to bring Bill and they all stand there until Eric tells them to hurry up and get it over with so they can all get out of there before they get caught. There is just one problem …. Bill has decided not to drink …….
UGH I HATE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!! …. Roll credits ……. (of course)
And now we wait until next week and the penultimate episode. Oh it has come around so fast :'(. The big question remains who will make it to the end? Things have totally taken a turn from the beginning of the seasons and all the bets have changed. Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching and Monday I will be back here to share my thoughts!
Main Cast Death Count This Episode
Violet – taken out in unceremonious fashion by a bullet in the back by Hoyt
Main Cast Death Count This Series
Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
My Favorite Lines From “Almost Home”
- Hoyt – “From my perspective it is all fucking awful!”
- Pam – “Why the fuck aren’t we already printing money.”
- Eric “The shorter the half life the greater the profit! ”
- Violet – “So you do have the balls to be loyal to at least one woman!”
- Violet– “All I wanted was for you to worship me for the perfect creature that I am ”
- Pam – “We are doing something stupid aren’t we”.
- Pam – “Of course it’s happening fast it’s Sookie. Everything she wants she has to have now!”
- Pam – “Drink the bitch and leave before we all die!”