True Blood Season 7 Ep 10 – Finale – “Thank You ” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are. The end of the end …. the final episode ever.  So sad 😦 and things aren’t going to get any better because let me warn you right now I WAS NOT AMUSED!!!!!!! So let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season… ummmmm you have pretty much missed it all)…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

So here we are …… the time to say goodbye.  Now things actually don’t start off too badly!  The Yakuza are not secretly waiting at Sookie’s house after all and she just looks depressed …. well because she does.  I guess I didn’t allow for the idea that the directors would realize that they would have to drive from Shreveport as usually they just make this stuff up to suit themselves… timing be damned.   Instead we have Bill reminiscing about him first calling on her blah blah blah.  Sookie quite rightly calls him out on everything and he tries to explain that all he wants is for her to live a normal life …. free of vampires …. and even better he has a plan!   He wants her to use her last fairy light to perform “The Ultimate Kindness”  because he loves her too much to ever let her go otherwise and he worries that vampires will always be hunting her. Sookie doesn’t look impressed and tells him to go but we can all see she is thinking about it.  **Cue opening credits …. for the final time ….. sad 😥 **

Now by far the best part of this whole finale!   This was the moment that my hopes were raised and I thought maybe …. just maybe the team might be able to pull it together.  Oh how wrong I was but these scenes were great! 

We get to see Mr Gus’s crazy team of Yakuza racing in their sports car towards Sookie’s house and in the meantime Mr Gus is getting drunk at the bar in Fangtasia.  In the basement Pam and Eric are hovering around Sarah and Eric announces he is going to let her escape through the tunnels.  Eric has a plan and it is a GOOD one!  Obviously completely over all his Hep V Crises and raring to go he has decided that the best plan is to kill Mr Gus and all his associates and to steal the New Blood formula and keep it for themselves! YES!! Great plan Eric … I LOVE it!  So Eric has Pam give Sarah some of her blood so they can always find her and glamours her into escaping and going into hiding and trusting no one.  Off she scampers and then our dynamic duo summon Mr Gus down to the basement complete with guards and as you can imagine he is none to amused to find his little money maker is gone.  Awwwww so sad! Pam and Eric quickly kill the guards (so easily in fact it makes you wonder what the hell they have been waiting for) and Mr Gus tries to make a run for it.  Eric can’t even be bothered to chase him because “humans are slow” and sends a fireball to turn Mr Gus into one very crispy critter  ….. bye bye Mr Gus.  You and your annoying accent won’t be missed at all!!!

Of course there are still the Yakuza group heading to deal with Sookie but fear not.  Eric swoops on over and dispatches them with Sookie just hearing a slight noise out the window.  Best scene of the night shows us Eric driving the sports car, crazy music blaring, dancing along with a pile of Yakuza bodies in the back seat!! LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!! Now I am not normally one for GIFS in my reviews but Click HERE to see it (Courtesy of Eric Northman Tumblr) because it was THE BEST scene of the entire episode :D.

Sadly that is it for the main episode with Eric.  We do get to see a little clip with Sarah begging Pam to turn her into a vampire to which Pam is highly amused and lets her know it is NEVER going to happen and we also find out that Sarah learned a lot from reading Bill’s book but Pam only skimmed the parts to read about her.  I LOVE Pam!!  What this finale needed was much more Pam and Eric and much less of everything else.  Sadly though that is all from them and then the episode just goes downhill …. fast!!!

We head over to the Compton manor where Jessica decides to come home for a final visit and she brings Hoyt with her.  After saying she will never understand she then basically does a 180 and tells Bill she will be OK and Bill summizes she will be with Hoyt and bluntly asks if they will be getting married eventually. Now they have been back together less than 24 hours at this point and we have to hear a ridiculous blurb about how Bill never got to walk his daughter down the aisle and how he never got to meet her future husband as he had been made vampire by then …. ummmmmm didn’t your daughter die as a child? No husband ever in the picture?  Whatever….. I don’t actually care at this point.  This whole thing was ridiculous. 20 minutes of this finale is wasted by a stupid wedding, totally pointless, in the daytime … and NO ONE CARES!!! UGH!!! This was torture!!!!!  Andy officiates (after a little chat with Bill about him being the heir to the Compton manor … oh continuity … the didn’t forget that Jessica can’t have the house yet and Andy agrees to rent it to Jessica and Hoyt for $1 a month basically forever), Jason is the best man, Sookie is the bridesmaid and Bill gives her away oh and Holly and Arlene are there too. WASTE OF TIME!!!!! The only “useful” thing to come out of it was that we learned Sookie could hear Bill’s thoughts showing us that this Hep V, combined with Sookie’s fairy blood was indeed making him more human.   Even begged the question (from my husband) ….. was Bill going to become human?? Was that going to be the big twist??  Personally I was thinking NOOOOOO WAY … but I have to admit .. that would have been WAY better than then ending we got stuck with.

As always when Sookie has to ponder any big decisions we get flashbacks to her childhood (Yes it was nice to see Gran again for a minute even though it was blatantly thrown in there so she could say that Sookie should never compromise herself because she is different) and then we get the discussion with Jason, who lets Sookie know he is not good at those kind of decisions but will stand by her no matter what she chooses and Sookie tells Jason she listened in Bridgette’s head and she likes him .. and he should act on that.  Subtle!!   Then eventually Sookie ends up talking to Reverend Daniels for some spiritual guidance.   Is Sookie the way she is because God wants her to be … or because he made a mistake.  UGH BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the hell kind of finale is this??? BORED BORED BORED!!!!! 

So the big question becomes what will Sookie do. As the end fast approaches she calls Bill and tells him she has made all the arrangements and he is to meet her in the cemetery at sundown.  We see her leave in a simple black dress, a stark contrast to her other meetings with Bill in her little white dress (that was a nice touch) and we find her waiting by Bill’s open grave.  She is surprised there is a coffin in there and when Bill arrives he explains that they used to do that as it was easier for the families.  Inside his coffin is the picture of him and his daughter (so that was the reason for that flashback before) and Bill lies down as Sookie prepares to blast him.  Wait …. NO WAY .. there is no way that she is going to kill Bill with her Fairy light and go back to being human …. and nope sure enough as she stands there for ages with the light in her hand we see the resignation cross her face and she says she can’t do it.   Knew it!  No way they would have Sookie kill Bill ….. she is going to save him .. or he will become human … right ……. WRONG!!! Sookie admits that she can’t give up being Fairy as it is a part of her but she asks him if he still wants to die and he does.  So she gabs a shovel and snaps it (hmmmmm OK … those things are MUCH harder than that to break) and creates a stake, climbs down into the coffin with him … and then with their hands both on it … plunges it in!   I CAN’T BELIEVE IT .. They actually killed off Bill …. for real this time .. no coming back as some mystical blood god ….. he is gone.   Sookie is left covered in vampire remains and we see her place the lid on the coffin and start covering it in dirt as she cries.  Wait that can’t be it …. .this is how it ends??  We see Sookie walking away from the cemetery still crying and the darkness covers the screen …. UMMMMM WHAT??? This is the end ……..

Actually that would have been a better ending!!!!  No …. as always they had to keep going.  Although at that point I was already bitching that there had been no more Pam and Eric I think I would have rather left it there.  It certainly would have been more dramatic.  Instead we are treated to 10 minutes of flash forwards.  So are you ready … here we go.

First flash forward is “about a year later” and we see a very cheesy Eric hosting an “infomercial” for New Blood complete with Pam.  They explain how although they never caught Sarah they were able to get a couple of drops of her blood from her escape through a window and synthesize it that way.  There is even a cameo from Charlaine Harris sitting behind the teleprompter.  

 

Flash Forward to 3 years after that and we get to see Pam and Eric opening the trading by ringing the bell at the NY Stock Exchange with a big poster of New Blood behind them so we are to assume that business is going very well for them

Flash forward to “The Following Thanksgiving” so I am guessing about 5 years?  And we get to see …. well pretty much everyone including a VERY pregnant Sookie.  As to who the father is … well we never get to see him.  We get a mystery pair of hands putting a turkey in a deep fryer outside in the sun and then a voice calling “Turkey is in” as Sookie potters around in the kitchen. We get a glimpse over at Jason’s house where we find a pregnant Bridgette and 3 kids already … one of those girls clearly looking older than 4 which would be the right age to fit in their stupid flash forward …… STUPID ROOKIE ERROR ….. (Side note … the song playing was actually played in Season 1 at Arlene and Rene’s engagement party)…… Back at Sookie’s we see Sam and Nicole getting out of the truck complete with one daughter (looking about 5) and another one obviously on the way (apparently they all needed to be pregnant to finish things off).

Suddenly it is night and we head over to Fangtasia where we see Eric sitting on his throne, looking bored and rather sad.  Pretty reminiscent of Season 1 Eric but with shorter hair and in complete contrast to the flash forwards already shown with his success.   We get to see that Pam is in the basement charging $100,000 a minute to bite Sarah and Pam is loving every minute of it.  Sarah on the other hand is tortured and having visions of Steve… which while visions of Steve are always amusing … it was sort of pointless. 

And then to finish we have the great big sweeping, all encompassing, show everyone happy, thanksgiving feast at Sookie’s where we get to see that Hoyt and Jessica are still together, Arlene and Keith are still together, James and Lafayette are still together, Revered Daniels and Lettie Mae,  even Jade Bodehouse has a guy and is at the feast.  LITERALLY everyone is there.  Holly, Andy and the kids … that haven’t aged … at all … not even Adelyn the fast growing fairy has age a day in the 4-5 years … ummmmm STUPID!!!! Then to top everything off we get to NOT see who Sookie is with …. except his back and a slight side view.

THE END 😦

Not the ending I wanted … not an ending I saw coming …. not an ending I am on board with ….. seriously they should have left it with Sookie covered in Bill’s blood …… overall a general let down so thank you HBO for sucking me in for 7 years and then leaving me wanting.   YOU SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

V””V

 

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

Mr Gus ?? (Does he count as main cast?)
BILL!!!! WOW they actually killed him off!! 

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie
Violet
Bill

My Favorite Lines From “Thank You”

• Sookie – “If you are feeling this nostalgic Bill I gotta ask …. What the Fuck???” 
• Pam – “Are you just winging it or do you have a plan here”
• Eric –  “I’ve tried trusting, i’ve tried sharing …. it’s just not fucking working for me!”
• Eric – “Humans are slow.” 
• Sarah – “I’m a horrible person … which is why I think I would make a kick ass vampire”
• Gran – “There are no limits on you if you don’t put them on yourself”. 

True Blood Season 7 Ep 9 – “Love is to Die ” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season …. and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season… ummmmm you have pretty much missed it all)…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

Only 2 episodes left …. EVER …..   AHHHHHHH As much as this season is continuing with the “filler episodes” (seriously you are pretty much running out of time here … LITERALLY) I am still so sad this this is ending.  At this point the only good thing is that it is pretty much all dealing with the cast we know and apart from one scene saying goodbye there are no more shifters or wolves to deal with in Bon Temps.  Awwwwww almost like the beginning …… *sigh* ……

This week was really just a whole lot of talking! For the first time I could really feel the writers were trying to “wrap things up” and that things really are ending.  Despite the fact that, and let’s be honest here, the plotlines have totally lost themselves many times over to the point where sometimes I don’t even think the writers know where to go with things …. we are all here because this show will always hold a special place in our hearts … well my hear anyway …. OK enough of that …. On with the show!!

This week starts up right where we left off last week with Bill refusing to drink the cure.  Despite Jessica and Sookie pleading and giving their best arguments Bill tells them he is choosing the True Death.  Eric seems to be the only one that even slightly understands as he stops Sookie from repeatedly slapping Bill as she demands answers and sends Bill away.  But not before Jessica can demand that he releases her.  Bill looks torn for just a moment but then says the beautiful little speech and he leaves with Eric comforting a sobbing Sookie.   Pam obviously understands how much this hurts and Jessica turns to her and sobs in her arms …. but this is Pam is still Pam and says that if she cries on the jacket she’ll have to pay for it! HA!  Wouldn’t want us thinking she was too nice now would we!  **Roll opening credits**

Slight detour after the credits with Sookie and Jessica now apparently visiting Sam’s place.  There doesn’t seem to be any reason for this other than the fact that the audience gets to find out that Sam has left with Nicole and doesn’t plan on coming back.  There are 2 notes on the table.  One for Sookie and one for Andy.  Sookie’s letter is full of the explanation and we get to see (via flashback) Sam and Nicole packing everything up and leaving.  So goodbye Sam.  Looks like you get to survive and there will be no bookish type ending (so at least we can be grateful for that!)   And thus ends the shifter / wolf input this episode.  YAY lol

Sookie and Jessica head to the bar where everyone seems to be hanging out with the justification that Arlene has seen Field of Dreams and is doing the we are going to all be here until the customers work out things are back open and fake it until we make it.  As there are no customers they are going to have their own little party (Big John is cooking, Lala and James are there,  Keith, Arlene, Holly, her boys and Adelyn, and now Sookie and Jessica oh and a mystery waitress ….. really there are still people in this town we don’t know??? Ummmm FAIL! ).   Sookie takes Andy in the back to give him his letter from Sam thinking it is going to be emotional but turns out that it just says that he resigns as mayor.  Poor Andy!! Although it was pretty funny!

There are lots of “wrapping up” moments this week.  Jessica and James sort out their differences and James goes off to be happy with Lafayette and Jessica goes off into the night (we find out why all too soon).

Everyone else settles down to eat but Sookie is separate at the bar.  After a little telepathic intervention from Adelyn, Arlene heads over and has a little heart to heart.  Sookie tells Arlene about Bill and asks how Arlene keeps starting over and Arlene basically tells her she just has to kind of make up her mind to do so and they head over to the table where everyone is sitting to eat.

Now here I though with the way the camera was panning and them calling Lafayette from the kitchen to come join them that something bad was about to happen.  Because that’s how it works right? Nice scene … setting up for crazy ….. but nope.  Apparently tonight they all just get to have a nice dinner.  See you know things are actually ending when that sort of thing happens 😦

While they are eating Bill gets an unexpected visit from Eric and yes it is another heart to heart.  This episode is absolutely overflowing with them.  Eric tries to explain that he thinks the disease talking and not really Bill.  He talks about it attacking his spirit and how when Pam had found him he was in the same place. Bill explains about his dreams and how that he can see that he is ruining her life and until he is gone she has no chance.  Something seems to register for Eric and he agrees to get Sookie to  talk to Bill so Bill can explain before he dies.

Eric goes back to Bellefleurs and finds Sookie and explains that he has spoken to Bill and she needs to talk to him and hear him out.  The way Eric looks at her when they are talking is just so lovely.  He offers to give her a lift and she points out he doesn’t have a car.  He swoops her up in his arms and they take to the sky.  Awwwwwww at this point I am almost back to wanting Eric and Sookie back together despite the fact that she most certainly DOES NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES deserve him … but he obviously loves her (although I can’t work out for the life of me why) *Sigh*.    When they land at Sookie’s the look that Eric gives her just breaks my heart (see picture) but she doesn’t seem to get it.  Or she does and she’s just ignoring it.  He tells her that her phone is ringing and it is probably Bill and then he takes off to the sky and she goes in …. it is of course Bill on the phone and he is coming there to call on her shortly. 

Over in another part of town Hoyt and Bridget are fighting because she is still mad that Hoyt doesn’t want kids.  But that isn’t the real issue for her.  The real issue is the obviously chemistry she saw between Hoyt and Jessica.  Now poor Hoyt really doesn’t remember anything from before but Bridget isn’t quite buying that and when he admits that he went to the clinic to donate blood for Bill.  Bridget just starts to forgive him when, with perfect timing, Jessica knocks at the door.  Jessica tries to explain to Bridget that Hoyt isn’t lying. That she knows him but he doesn’t know her.  Hmmmm can you imagine being a non vamp person and trying to get your head around that lol.   Bridget tells Hoyt that she is confused and doesn’t want to hear any of it but if Hoyt does he can go out there but basically not to come back….. and of course he does!

Jessica explains that Bill has released her and everything going on with him and that she felt she had no one else she could talk to because he was the first man that she every loved.   The whole scene is really sweet.  These two always made a really cute couple! 

Bridget calls Jason as he is the only person that she know’s in the whole town.  She tells him that Jessica is explaining everything and Jason rushes over in his police car with the lights and sirens blazing just in time to get punched in the face and knocked out by Hoyt.  Yep Jason guess Hoyt has been told everything.  Next thing we know Jason is in the car with Bridget and as he comes around she is telling him they are heading to the hospital. Jason rationalizes that there is nobody working there and he has had loads of concussions and will be fine so to just go to his house but he wants to make it clear that they will not be having sex tonight.   Bridget is pretty shocked and explains that there is no way that would have happened anyway but Jason knows better lol.  She doesn’t quite understand but oh she will.

When they get to the house Bridget is trying to get her flight changed to go home but is getting nowhere with the airline.  Jason asks if it is a man or a woman on the line and when he finds out it is a woman he takes the phone and turns on that classic Jason charm.  This season really has shown Jason at his best.  He has been brilliant and again manages to save the day in his own crazy way and he gets Bridget a flight back before heading into the other room to put an ice pack on his head …. and then his other head to try and convince himself he is not going to sleep with Bridget. 

Bridget comes out of the other room and says she is hungry but all they have is beer. They sit at the counter for a bit and Jason explains about his life and how Math was hard and women weren’t.  All Jason can think about are the things that Hoyt told him when he first found out about Jason and Jessica.   Jason tells her the whole story and when he finishes Bridget tells him he is wrong and that  she is going to teach him how not to have sex with a woman lol. (Yes a skill every man is just itching to learn i’m sure!)

They lay in bed (on separate sides) and the plan is to tell each other facts about each other that they don’t know.  Jason ends up admitting that he wants children and he doesn’t know if he is right to be a father.  What if he has a daughter and she meets a guy like him.  What would he do then?  Well the obvious answer is most men would freak out and ground the daughter and kill the guy ….. but apparently the right answer is … you will be fine.  Everything is already in him to be a great guy.  Well OK then *sigh* …. and nope .. no Bridget Jason action.  He even keeps his top on. 

Meanwhile Hoyt and Jessica have moved their talk inside and things are getting more intense and Jessica eventually uses her blood to heal his hand and then things get all hot and intense and we get some nice Hoyt / Jessica action.  I guess those two were meant to be together after all ❤

At Fangtasia it is time for a change of pace and Sarah is taken upstairs ….to the back office for a makeover. They are turning her back to blonde.  Pam is back in hair mode again complete with foils!! (Season 2 anyone??)  She makes a big deal about glamouring Sarah so that she won’t scream but she can still talk. Hmmmm this could be a problem or why show it?   In the meantime Pam has a nice little story to go with things about whores and how Sarah will be making them a great deal of money because they will be able to sell her out as a “cure” to the highest bidders. 

Bill is walking across the cemetery to visit Sookie and he stops at the graves of his children.  With the minutes ticking down to the end of this installment I will confess I half expected him to collapse there and then and leave us hanging until next week to find out what happens but apparently that is not to be the case as we see him arrive at the Sookies.  Sookie is inside sitting at the table but I think something is wrong.  I think the Yukuza are there.  Why you might ask ….. well wait for it ……..

Back at Fangtasia Eric walks in to find a very annoyed Ginger who is bitching that Eric didn’t tell her that he wasn’t going to die.  Eric is not in the mood to deal with her and bitches back about how he has spent all evening dealing with other people’s relationship problems and how that is so not him and so he wants to apologize to her and make it up to her the best way he can think of.  He says he is going to fuck her!  He asks where she imagines them doing it …. seriously I thought at this point it was going to change into a dream but nope .. apparently Ginger is going to get her wish and finally get some Eric action!  Sadly for Ginger she does’t seem able to take a whole lot of Eric action before collapsing into a heap on the floor leaving Eric with nothing other than messed up hair.   It’s all rather ridiculous but she seems happy and she’s waited 7 seasons for her moment so I’m glad she at least enjoyed it lol

Sadly for Eric things are about to get a whole lot worse.  He goes hunting for Pam and finds her silvered to a table in the dungeon with a nasty stake hanging perilously above her suspended by a few ropes.  The Yukuza are gradually cutting the ropes to get Eric to talk and it works.  He admits that Sookie knows about Sarah being the cure …. the music turns dark and somber and seriously at this point I was fearing for Pam.  I am still not 100% sure that Pam will make it through but she survived this week.  I won’t lie, my heart was definitely in my throat there for a minute……. 

And now we wait until next week and the final episode. Oh it has come around so fast 😥.    The big question still remains who will make it to the end? Who will Sookie end up with?  Will she become a vampire to save Bill?  Why do I still have a horrible feeling Pam is going to be one of the ones to not make it? Things have totally taken a turn from the beginning of the seasons and all the bets have changed.  Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching and Monday I will be back here to share my final  thoughts!

 

V””V

 

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

None

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie
Violet

My Favorite Lines From “Love is to Die”

• Pam – “If you cry on my jacket you’re paying for it sweetheart” 
• Bridget – “Southern Eyelashes that go on for days.”
• Hoyt –  “I want you to tell me the story of us ”
• Arlene – “We can’t have sex .. it would kinda kill him if we did.” 
• Eric – “Get over yourself Bill! ”
• Eric – “I’m over 1000 years old! If I had an aptitude for marriage counselling don’t you think I would have figured that out by now”. 
• Jason– “You just happened to pick a guy who’d already met the girl he was supposed to be with”

True Blood Season 7 Ep 8 – “Almost Home” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season …. and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

Wow only 3 episodes left including this one.  AHHHHHHH As much as this season is continuing with the “filler episodes” (seriously you are pretty much running out of time here … LITERALLY) I am still so sad this this is ending.  I have the feeling that the finale is going to kick some major ass and I will just be yelling obscenities at the screen for several minutes :(.  On the plus side there were ZERO shifter mentions / issues/ references this week 😀 So that is something to celebrate lol.

Right then everybody ready because here we go!   Again this week can be split up into just a few little boxes as other than a couple of proper plot points this week was just full of things that are (I hope) going to go somewhere.   We start with Sarah or “Numi” at the camp knowing they are all outside waiting to kill her.  She is talking to her imaginary Jason and he agrees that it is time to die.  Out she goes ready to take on death and claiming that she will come back as “The Princess Of Peace” … ummmm OK crazy bitch ….  and Eric almost delivers it to her (seriously lets blame the Hep V for addling his brain THIS much …. I mean DRINK FIRST …. Cure … remember???) but Pam grabs one of the guns armed with a wooden bullet and threatens to kill herself if he doesn’t cure himself and hand her over.  Thankfully he does and we get a shot of the powerful Eric yelling at the sky with some overly ridiculous long fans but hey … HE IS CURED!!!!! Wooooo Hooooo!!!! And Sarah is tossed to the floor to be swept up by the corporation and the opening credits roll!

One of the main stories this episode is Sookie still desperate to save Bill.   We see them relaxing (and we see way too much of Bill and his nasty veins) and they are chatting about the past.  Boring boring boring!  Was this meant to be a recap for us? Because those of us that watch a lot know this … and we also don’t care.  The only possibly relevant part of this conversation could be that Sophie Ann wanted to breed Sookie.   That is 2 baby references in regard to Bill in 2 weeks …. plus we think we are going to get through the whole episode with out a “Bill Flashback” and technically I suppose we do because the one they show 5 minutes from the end turns out to be Sookie and not Caroline holding a baby … which is not a baby but a bundle of darkness. Hmmmmmm I assume there is a reason for this but I have no idea what it is and I am not really sure that as Bill is involved I actually care.

Perhaps the most annoying (and pointless time filling crap) this episode is the whole Tara chapter which does at least finally gets closed once and for all.  Lafayette and Lettie Mae are still digging random holes in their old houses’s garden (while the confused family just stand there and look on …… I am assuming at this point if you live in Bon Temps pretty much anything goes???).  The Reverend comes along to try and talk them out of doing anymore but instead gets convinced to join them on the V trip and James turns up and supplies the blood.  I adore James!  I wish they were doing more with his character this season!!!! He seems to have been  relegated to V supplier :(.   Anyway ….. whole bunch of time spent with the Lala, Lettie Mae and the Rev high as kites and following Tara through a pointless flashback to an old birthday where we learn that Lettie Mae was abused by Tara’s dad.  He freaked out because he couldn’t find his gun (turns out Tara had hidden it) …. Tara has the opportunity to shoot him but doesn’t and she buries the gun in the back yard and he leaves them forever.   That is what they are hunting for.  The gun.   OK ANYONE have any guesses as to why of ALL the things they could have come up with THIS was the storyline they went with.  UGH YAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Gun found Tara and her mom say goodbye and she heads off and is supposedly at peace now.   WASTE OF SCREEN TIME!!!!!

In more exciting news Jason is over at the Fortenberry house with Hoyt and Bridget as they sort through all the things and there is a fair amount of tension going on especially as Bridget mentions having babies.  Hoyt is not in a “baby” place and apparently doesn’t know if he ever will be.  Poor Jason is just sitting there when he gets a text, complete with pictures, showing that Violet has Adelyn and Jessica all tied up and telling him he needs to come.   Obviously he rushes straight to the car but there is a problem…. Bridget doesn’t want to stay and fight with Hoyt so she gets in the car too.  Hmmmmm weird!!!  Jason calls Andy but he is too far out so he is rushing to the rescue … and apparently Bridget is going with them because she won’t get out the car!

Jason leaves Bridget in the car with a gun full of Silver bullets (which is not too thrilled about but hey she was the one that insisted on going …. at least she didn’t insist on going INTO the house).  As Jason explores there is some beautiful music playing (I need to track this down!) and he is jumping at all the statues placed everywhere as if Violet doesn’t already know that he has arrived lol.  She of course pounces on him and he doesn’t stand a chance and before he knows it he is he is gagged and restrained and learning about the fates that are about to end all the prisoners, described in glorious detail as Violet swans around a room she clearly loves and has used many times in the past.

Wade is going to have all his fingers crushed and then his head crushed in a vice while Adelyn watches.   Next will be Adelyn who will get to experience this awful claw looking device called “The Breast Ripper” which will be heated up and then literally grasp and tear all the flesh from her chest and the she will slowly drain her dry. Jessica will be next and Violet correctly works out that Jessica was a virgin where she was turned and so her punishment will be to be fucked by a red hot metal dildo every 10 minutes for days.  Wow … Violet really isn’t happy!   Before we can find out what fate was in store for Jason, Violet tells us was that all she wanted was for Jason to worship her for the perfect creature that she was …. and then Hoyt appears and shoots her in the back and it is bye bye Violet.  Another abrupt ending with a lot less drama than hoped for :(.

So Violet is dead, Hoyt is the hero and the prisoners are safe.  You can see Jessica looking at him in a whole new light again.  Bridget is sitting with Jason and Hoyt and Jessica are chatting and there are just sparks everywhere.  I wonder if they will unglamour Hoyt somehow.  Hmmmmmm  This could get interesting but they need to hurry up! There are only 2 episodes to sort this out!! Damn you HBO!   Andy and Holly arrive and are thrilled that Hoyt saved the day.  Yay … Go Hoyt!!   It is shame that he won’t know that he killed the vampire that killed his mother.  I hope he gets to find this out ..especially with them having preached the whole “circle of everything” ….  although then he would know that Maxine had definitely gone to the dark side and in that moment Violet was the good guy ….. kinda …. fun that it is all so mixed up!  Sometimes True Blood can make things interesting after all :D.

Later we see Hoyt head to the Compton mansion and he is starting to leave Jessica a note and a brown bag (ummmm this all looks rather familiar ………) when Jessica hears him and invites him in. In the bag is some of his blood that he had drained at the clinic because he is “clean” and thought it would help with Bill.  Awwwww now if we could just fix that pesky glamour issue ……. He says that him and Bridget will be around for a couple of days before they leave back for Alaska and we all know in the True Blood world that leaves time for ANYTHING to happen :D… and I am sure it will!

The third and final main plot line this week is that now they have Sarah they are going to synthesize her blood and create New Blood (Nu Blood?) to cure everyone.  Eric and Pam are wondering what the delay is and they get a little lesson in how this business is going to work.  Turns out it only took a couple of hours to synthesize and perfectly replicate Sarah’s blood. The thing is they don’t want it perfect.  If it is perfect then everyone will be cured and that doesn’t create a “Demand and Supply” cycle.  We learn that Gilette COULD produce a razor that would never dull …. but they don’t ….. Energizer could make an everlasting battery … but they don’t.  What they want to create is something that will keep them healthy as long as they are drinking the product and urges Pam and Eric to just stay quiet about it.

As Pam and Eric do love their money this is not as issue at first ….. but Eric just HAS to go and let Sookie know that he is OK now *sigh* and you know what that means! Yep she sees that he is cured and she wants the same for Bill! UGH!!!  Even worse you can see that Eric wants to give it to her …. but he can’t.  He tells her that dawn is coming and he will return the following night with answers and takes off into the sky leaving a very frustrated Sookie standing in the doorway.

Well we all know Sookie isn’t going to wait …. especially as she doesn’t believe that Bill may HAVE until the following evening and so she comes up with a plan and that plan involves jumping in her truck and driving out to Fangtasia.  Yes AWESOME plan Sookie!  She is greeted by the Yokomoto guards and she convinces them that she needs to see Eric Northman but that does not go down well overall.  Luckily she is smart enough not to argue when Eric calls her a Fangbanger and pretends to glamour her.  She does overhear cowboy leaders thoughts that he hopes that they are not betraying him and something seems off and she also hears that the cure is in the basement.  She goes through her little pretending routine (with a series of absolutely ridiculously over exaggerated nods and head shakes)   and leaves Fangtastia but only to drive as far as the back entrance where she sneaks back in and find Sarah in the basement.  Finally she does something smart and leaves Sarah but we all know when she leaves she plans on returning that night with Bill to fix him!

Night falls and cowboy boss is not feeling too trusting and tells Eric and Pam he is going out and suggests they stay in the club … with some of his guards.  They don’t object but we soon see them heading down to Sarah and Pam quite rightly points out that they are going to do something stupid aren’t they!  Love Pam! Strangely the guards don’t seem to be interested in anything they are doing unless they are trying to leave (or I assume leave with Sarah) so they get to visit alone.  As they are deciding exactly what to do Sookie arrives back with Jessica helping to bring Bill and they all stand there until Eric tells them to hurry up and get it over with so they can all get out of there before they get caught.  There is just one problem …. Bill has decided not to drink …….

UGH I HATE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!! …. Roll credits ……. (of course)

And now we wait until next week and the penultimate episode. Oh it has come around so fast :'(.    The big question remains who will make it to the end? Things have totally taken a turn from the beginning of the seasons and all the bets have changed.  Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching and Monday I will be back here to share my thoughts!

 

V””V

 

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

Violet – taken out in unceremonious fashion by a bullet in the back by Hoyt

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie
Violet

My Favorite Lines From “Almost Home”

• Hoyt – “From my perspective it is all fucking awful!”
• Pam – “Why the fuck aren’t we already printing money.”
• Eric “The shorter the half life the greater the profit! ”
• Violet – “So you do have the balls to be loyal to at least one woman!” 
• Violet– “All I wanted was for you to worship me for the perfect creature that I am ”
• Pam – “We are doing something stupid aren’t we”. 
• Pam – “Of course it’s happening fast it’s Sookie.  Everything she wants she has to have now!”
• Pam – “Drink the bitch and leave before we all die!”

True Blood Season 7 Ep 7 – “May Be The Last” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season …. and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because! Oh and let me start by saying this week was (for me) yet another week of filler, which when they are only giving us 10 episodes is a bit weak for me!  They hooked me this season with that one great episode and I thought here we go and have since been holding on with exciting looking previews that quite simply don’t deliver!!

Right then everybody ready because here we go!   Honestly this week can be split up into a few little blocks of what’s happening and then a couple extra bits thrown in and so that is how I am going to break this down.

Let’s start off this week the way True Blood did (and the only real story line people are actually invested in at this point) with Eric, Pam, and the crazy corporation crew at Amber’s house. They already have Amber strapped down with silver chains and are taking it in turns to try and get information out of her about her sister and how she was cured.  Now hang on a second ….. wouldn’t the FIRST thing you tried as a vamp be drinking the blood of a cured person (vamp)?  I mean seriously!! You know she was infected, and now she’s not ….. would that not occur to anyone to at least give it a try???  Well apparently not.  Fear, reasoning, and then bribing seem to be the go to efforts and when all of those fail Eric loses his temper, hallucinates Sarah, and then stakes Amber … all before the opening credits.  Well then there goes that plan.  Crazy cowboy corporation guy though we find out as the episode goes on does in fact have a plan!  Now that they know Sarah is a cure he knows the government will help find her and then they can synthesize her blood and sell a cure as “New Blood”.  Awesome!  Eric looks none to convinced as killing her is still top of his bucket list but even he appears to see the value in the plan and reluctantly agrees.  Not sure anyone in the room is convinced that they are actually working together but that is the plan .. for now.

Later (when they find Sarah) it is made to look like the corporation is going to betray Eric, leaving him and Pam behind while they go to deal with Sarah (who they track down using government surveillance and find her at the Light Of Day Institute of all places)  but SURPRISE. At the end of the episode they are outside at night waiting and they all go off hunting together.  Of course we don’t actually SEE them get to Sarah…. that is all saved for NEXT WEEK Grrrrrrrr.

Talking of Sarah she has a fairly interesting episode.  As mentioned she has gone to the LODI to hide and she has some interesting flashbacks and hallucinations that include Jason lecturing her about how Death is coming in the form of Eric, and then later Steve Newlin and her little Guru friend debating the benefits of dying a Christian versus a Buddhist.  Honestly? These little interactions were sadly one of the highlights of tonight’s episode.  Yup really not a lot going on.  Well she is all set to get hers next week …… we can hope at least!

One of the of the other main stories is the kidnapping of Adelyn and Wade last week by crazy Violet.  Sadly other than Andy and Holly running around all episode trying to find them not a whole lot happens until the very end.  Andy does remember that Adelyn has had Jessica’s blood and so calls her to see if anything bad has happened that she has sensed which for 90% of the episode Adelyn is having a great time.  Violet has taken them off to a house and locked them in a room for the day to have some “fun” complete with a litany of sex toys that these kids have no idea what to do with.  We also learn that Violet used to enjoy having sex with her brother too.  Hmmmm OK then.  But the main story is they are away from everyone, Violet goes to sleep for the day leaving them alone, and nothing other than them having sex happens until the very very end when Violet makes it clear that she is about to torture Adelyn and Jessica finally senses her fear and heads off to the rescue….. but again we have to wait for next week!! Do you see a pattern forming here??? *rolls eyes*

In other news there are 2 minor stories floating around in the background. Hoyt is back in town and he is not alone.  He has his pretty new blonde girlfriend Bridget with him who works with him in Alaska.  Their first stop is Bellefleurs (which Hoyt obviously thought was Merlotte’s) and Arlene calls Jason because Hoyt obviously doesn’t remember him.  Jason comes down and he is definitely interested in Bridget who pretty much does everything short of throw herself at him.  UGH really Jason?? Aren’t you back with Jessica now you have to want Hoyt’s girlfriend AGAIN? This seemed pretty pointless to me unless they are going to have the repeat circumstances somehow trigger his memories?  There was a nice moment where Jason lied and told Hoyt that Maxine died as one of the good guys and not a crazy townsperson and that he had dealt with the person responsible. Hmmmmm OK?  Not quite sure where this is all going but again it was introduced … to be dealt with later. 

And then we have Arlene and her dreams of Keith (who we learn is 515) and her obvious attraction to him despite in her dreams explaining to him that she is NOT a fangbanger and then having sex with him on the pool table.  OK. Whatever.   Arlene’s main job this week is waxing lyrical with Sam who is dealing with Nicole’s ultimatum and it is unsure what he wants to do.  Arlene and him sit and drink and try and help Sam decide what is important to him.  It looks like Sam is getting ready to leave but we also see that this discussion has left Arlene feeling very depressed and in fact feels so bad that at the end Keith comes to visit her as soon as it gets dark because “that kind of pain can be dangerous”.  We learn that Arlene has Hep V (which anyone of us could have pretty much figured out from all the biting etc that happened at Fangtastia) and so Keith, being completely delightful, says that they can just dance. Awwwwwww!!! It was actually rather sweet.

So on to the final main story which of course is Bill and his Hep V that is spreading faster than on anyone else.  But Sookie is not giving up.  She has a plan and that plan involves finding Dr Ludwig … remember her? (Season 2 Maenad scratch ……) Well she gets her to the house and hear several times that Dr Ludwig isn’t scared of anything blah blah blah and we also learn that she has treated another vamp / fae infection but in that case it was a full fae and not a half and it was quicker but not this quick so Sookie isn’t responsible for the super fast progression?  Or maybe she is because when Dr Ludwig finds out that Niall is her relative she freaks out and leaves.  Now you would expect this to have some sort of relevance to things but it really doesn’t.  Sookie manages to get hold of Niall to see if he can help her.  Other than eating some spaghetti, letting her know that he could have prevented her from infecting Bill because he is always watching and yes he know ….  and then showing Sookie a flashback with Bill’s wife giving birth to their daughter and explaining the miracle of birth that happens every day his visit seems pretty pointless.  He lets us know that he doesn’t like Bill for Sookie and never has and that his magic can’t help with anything.  Well then that clears that up.  Really?? Why?? Oh time filler ….. because seriously there was NO other reason for it at all that I can see! 

The episode ends with Sookie running over to Bill’s in her white dress, very reminiscent of the first time they were together, and she tells Bill that she will stay with him until the end.  Of course this ends up with them having sex in front of the fire and we get to see a very unwelcome sight of Naked Bill covered in Hep V Veins.  UGH well thank you very much True Blood.  Naked Bill at the best of times is bad enough but really??? BLAH!!!!   Even better his fangs pop out and he is obviously debating biting her and well all know THAT would be a bad idea …. Really Bill??? Look where the last bite got you!! He decides against it and sticks to the sex.  Wonderful and dull!!! 

And now we wait until next week which again looks promising but at this point who the hell knows because after all LAST WEEK … THIS WEEK’S looked promising and what an overall fail that was!!!  The big question remains who will make it to the end?? Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching and Monday I will be back here to share my thoughts!

 

V””V

 

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

None (Although Amber died …. I suppose that should get a mention)

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie

My Favorite Lines From “May Be The Last”

• Andy – “Even if they don’t want to answer teenagers can have a pavlovian response to a ringing cell phone”
• Violet – “Your imagination is a muscle … use it or lose it! ”
• Eric “You want Eric to be the fucking spokesman for your vampire Jenny Craig commercials”
• Sookie – “There is a miracle waiting out there for Bill.  I just have to go out there and find it! ” 
• Dr Ludwig– “Oooooh how very spooky – A cemetery …. shall we?? ”
• Niall  – “I don’t like him for you!.”
  
• Niall – “There is magic in the ordinary – Birth is a miracle, love is a miracle, death is a miracle, forgiveness is a miracle.”

True Blood Season 7 Ep 6– “Karma” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season …. and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because! Oh and with Comic Con being last  weekend there was an AWESOME trailer for the upcoming final episodes shown ….. if you missed it you can check it out HERE.

Right then everybody ready because here we go and this week starts off in a pretty damn awesome fashion with Eric strolling down the hallways carrying the ripped out jaw of the Yukuza member he took down last week.  Of course life can’t be that easy and there are a bunch more waiting for him – all of which he takes out although you can see he is finding it a lot more of an effort that normal (but nothing like the failure to punch through a wall a couple of episodes ago …… sooo continuity issues or adrenalin rush??? Who the hell knows at this point but we get to see Eric being all well ….. Eric like lol so that is always fun). I did love his little pause to ask “Really?” before smashing up a few more of their little killer team but sadly this fun comes to an end when other team members bring a silvered Pam around the corner.  UGH really Pam?  Again? I know you can fight better than this!!!!!  Pam and Eric are escorted in some nifty looking cars to (what I assume to be) the Yokomoto headquarters where they are placed in a room with huge windows and a clock in front of them with a countdown to dawn.  As they are left there alone, presumably to meet the sun, Eric says to Pam “Our first Sunrise together” …. awwwwwww and they share a look and the opening credits roll.

One of the other big revelations last week at the end was Bill showing the first signs of Hep V.  That takes up a fair amount of time this episode and starts with him calling a lawyer to get his affairs in order.  Turns out this is quite a popular thing at the moment and so no appointments are available and so the only option he has is to go down and wait to be seen.   Jessica overhears this conversation but doesn’t confront him about it even when he says he will be leaving and won’t be back until late so not to wait up for him.  We get to follow Bill to the lawyers office which looks like a DMV waiting room with a take a number and wait system and the average wait time it 5-7 hours which will take them up until after sunrise.   Not having much other option as the tell tale black veins are already spreading Bill sits in for the long haul and we get to see that his Hep V is spreading at an alarming rate.  The nasty black veins are appearing more and more before our eyes.  Well that can’t be good! 

On the other side of town Lafayette is none to amused with Lettie Mae’s actions at the party and he takes her back to his house.  She tries to insist she needs to go home because the Reverend will be waiting but Lala is too smart to fall for that knowing that she gave him enough Benedryl to knock him out for hours.  When they get inside James is waiting and looking to take Lafayette up on his offer of a place to crash but things take a little turn with Lettie Mae ranting on about seeing Tara …. James is actually on HER side.  He says that Lafayette of all people should understand the doorways it can open and they come to an arrangement that while James goes off to bed for the day Lafayette and Lettie Mae will go on a V induced trip together.

 Now I want to take a little time out here for a bitch ….. not really relevant to anything other than my annoyance to continuity so feel free to skip to the next paragraph for episode only related info. People have been getting high off of V in this show since Season 1 with Jason and the trips we took then.  Now they have changed the rules so often it makes my head spin (if you use it for healing you don’t seem to get the effects …. unless you are Lettie Mae) …. if you drink a few drops for “finding purposes” again no fun effects ….. but a couple of weeks ago Lettie Mae swallowed a great deal more of Willa’s blood and had a very short induced little trip.  This week Lala and her take not much more than A DROP of James’s blood (and honestly he isn’t exactly a super vamp now is he???) and they trip for HOURS apparently.

OK Rant over … so yes off Lala and Lettie Mae go on their V Trip and they find Tara, back on the cross, and they get her down, and then she is gone and running through the forest (in a dress that looks suspiciously like one of the Maenad’s bridesmaid’s dresses from Season 2) and they find her at her old house crazily digging up random holes in the back yard like a crazy woman.  We don’t get to see WHAT she is digging for as Reverend Daniels chooses that moment to come to the house and shake them out of their little V trip.   Well Lettie Mae is none to thrilled with that and even Lafayette argues that Tara is trying to tell them something but the Rev has had enough and says she has to choose.  Well of course she chooses Tara but we have no idea at this point what that is going to mean.  To be continued next week I guess. 

So I am sure we all remember the Jason / Jessica / Violet issue from last week?  Well Violet starts this week with  whole new approach to things rather than KILL which has been her previous motto.  She decides the ultimate seduction is the way to go but even with that when Jessica calls Jason because she needs him to get Sookie so she can tell him about Bill he leaves to go to her.  Of course he thinks Violet is asleep at the time but once he leaves she goes mad and smashes everything up.  THERE is the Violet I have been expecting to see!  

Jason in the meantime has gone to get Sookie to take her to Jessica’s and they get the news that Jessica has discovered Bill is Hep V positive.  At first Jason won’t believe it but then Sookie realizes that when she scratched her arm with the big stick when she was playing bait she got drenched in Hep V Vamp goo and so it must be her.  They don’t want to believe it but it is off to the clinic they go for a blood test and promises to Jessica that they will let her know when they do.

Unsurprisingly the results are in and Sookie has Hep V and I am expecting that her weird Fairy blood is the cause for Bill’s symptoms and their rapid progress.  Guess Fairy blood isn’t good for everything after all! One good thing to come out of it all is that while they are waiting Jason decides he is going to break it off with Violet …. and when I say good I mean good viewing … obviously we ALL know Violet isn’t going to take that one lying down!

 Talking of Bill we see him still getting worse at the lawyer’s office and True Blood writers suddenly seem to remember that vampires during the day suffer from the bleeds. Oh well done them *rolls eyes* …. won’t even get started on that lack of continuity.  Any way  Bill finally gets to be seen and discovers that there are more problems for him than just his Hep V.  Under the law the will he has was made when he was “impersonating a human” and thus isn’t recognized as it was before vampires came out of the coffin.  As of right now, because of a law passed before the evil Governor Burrell lost his head, vampire progeny are NOT recognized as heirs and so his estate would pass to the government should anything happen to him.  Bill’s only recourse? Adopt Jessica legally and go that route …. which could take up to a year …. unless he wants to pay the lawyer $10 Million to expedite the process.   Bill tries to glamour her into skipping that but she only laughs, (as did I actually because really Bill? She is a lawyer that works with vampires all day … did you not think she would have those fancy contacts? … we will put that slip on your behalf down to the Hep V because your next actions amused me lol) ………. Bill’s next action was to stab her in the throat with a letter opener!! HA!!! Die greedy bitch Die!!!!  Even better he grabs a pencil as he leaves and takes out the vampire guard with it on his way out.  Well played Bill Compton … well played indeed!   He heads home to a waiting Jessica and Sookie who have been crying and it is obvious that they know.

Talking of  Bon Temps remember Jason’s warning to Adelyn and Wade? Well they chose to ignore it and are going for it right under Andy’s roof! Well that wasn’t smart and of course Andy catches them and sends a poor naked Wade running out into the yard with Andy chasing after him, Holly not far behind and Arlene screaming they are gonna wake the baby.   Andy wants to kill Wade, Holly looks like she wants to kill Andy and generally this is not good.  They all go their separate ways but we get to see Arlene and Holly head to Bellfleurs (yes remember that never actually got cleaned up? Well amazingly so did the writers) and they set to getting that place back ready to open and Arlene actually has some good advice.  When Andy comes by to apologize it is clear things aren’t going well but Arlene sends them off to TALK to the kids together.  Just one little problem with that …. when they get to the house the kids have gone!  Seriously? What did they expect? Andy …. well I can see why he didn’t get it but Holly really should have known better! I saw that coming a mile away.  Luckily for them they told Wade’s brother where they were going (Fort Bellefleur) but will they get there in time???   

Also in Bon Temps Nicole is being a pain in the ass and she wants to go “home” for good and she wants Sam to go with her. She basically calls the town crazy, Sam the mayor of crazy town and that he wants to be there crazier still.  Yes there was a whole lot of crazy being thrown around.  If it wasn’t for the fact that she was carrying Sam’s baby I would say good riddance! UGH she gets on my nerves!!! More wait and see stuff here too.

Now remember poor Pam and Eric trapped in a room? Well it turns out that some cowboy wanna be is now in charge of the Yokomoto corporation and he is broke!  Tru Blood is worthless and he wants to get his hands on Sarah Newlin and he thinks the dynamic duo can help.  Eric isn’t having any of it but with only minutes before sunrise Pam is thinking otherwise.  After a few minutes of Eric and Pam starting to burn (the main sticking point being that Eric wants to be the one to actually kill Sarah and Yoko guy not so keen) they come to a deal and our pair is safe ….. for now … and at sundown will be taking them all to Sarah’s sister’s house.  The only place Sarah could possibly go.

They were right, of course, and we get to see Sarah sneaking into her sister’s house during daylight only to be attacked by her sister.  Sadly her sister is too ill to really hurt her and ends up collapsing and coughing up blood before inflicting damage…. but the game is just beginning.   When Amber wakes back up Sarah lets her know that there was a cure.  A cure that Sarah drank all of making her now the only cure out there and she tells Amber to drink from her (Which honestly by the time Sarah had been halfway through the sentence if I was the sister I would have been biting already!).

We don’t get to see what happens but when Eric, Pam and the Yokomoto crew turn up at Amber’s house they see immediately that she is cured! Oh next week should be good! 

To finish up Jason goes home to tell Violet that things are over.  He gets himself all psyched up only to go in and discover that she isn’t there, the place is trashed and she has left a note saying that things aren’t working and goodbye.  Ummmmm what???  Oh don’t worry Violet hasn’t gone completely soft.  We see that she has tracked down Adelyn and Wade at Fort Bellefleur and convinces them to leave their phones and come with her because she knows a place where they can be alone and safe by telling them that with her fairy blood if she could find them the bad vamps could too.  Oh this isn’t going to be good.  Revenge is best in the sneaky way and taking the one thing that will hurt Jessica seems like a pretty good plan to me! 

And now we wait until next week which is looking like a more action packed ride. Adelyn and Wade are at the mercy of a crazy Violet, Eric and crew know that Sarah is their chance at a cure, and although we will have to deal with the inevitable Sookie and Bill drama I am OK with that. The game is well and truly on now.  Odds are changing with a cure now in play (honestly did anyone doubt that would happen?) and so who will make it to the end?? Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching and Monday I will be back here to share my thoughts!

 

V””V

 

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

None (Although notable mention of Bill killing the lawyer and the vamp “guard” …. THAT was awesome! )

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie

My Favorite Lines From “Karma”

• Eric – “Our first sunrise together”
• Pam – “I imagined my death many times but I never thought I would meet the sun in some place with wall to wall carpet”
• Eric “When I find her I am going to wrap my hands around her neck and snap her little blonde bobble head”
• Nicole – “This town is fucking crazy and you are the mayor of crazy!” 
• Jason – “Bill was a bone fide vampire God not six months ago. ”
• Arlene  – “Shit happens Holly – ya clean it up.”
  
• Sookie – “Life’s too short to be with someone you don’t love.”
• Amber – “You can’t just dye your hair, and blow a guru, and absolve yourself of all the horrific shit you have done in your life.”

True Blood Season 7 Ep 5 – “Lost Cause” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season ….and we are halfway through already 😦 ….  and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

Well I have to say, after last week’s enjoyment, this week was definitely not as good for me BUT it did have it’s moments and they are definitely setting up for something big …… “Good Big” or “Bad Big” … honestly? who the hell knows with this show but the twists and turns just keep on coming.

We start this week back at Fangtasia and Eric and Pam setting up to depart to hunt for the elusive Sarah Newlin.   Willa is none to thrilled with this plan and says (after a huge Mommy and Daddy issue rant) she has information that she will give them IF Eric releases her.  At this point I can only assume that Eric just doesn’t really care that much about Willa because he does it.  Me, personally, I would have had Eric laugh and just command her to tell him as he commanded her to go with them last week.  That little maker trick never gets old for me….. BUT this does allow Pam and Eric to road trip alone …… so be it!  Willa informs them about Sarah’s hidden vamp sister so off to Dallas our intrepid vamps go, courtesy of Anubis airlines and their nifty travel coffins (although as my husband pointed out … it is still NIGHT when they left…. could they not get in the coffins at the airport just before they fly???) ….. Well if they had we would have missed Ginger and her screaming!  She is none to thrilled by this turn of about yelling that she has been Eric’s sex slave for FIFTEEN YEARS …But without the sex!!!  She asks if they know what a sex slave is without the sex …. and Pam (LOVE HER) says .. A SLAVE!! Ha!! Poor Ginger.  She demands that Eric at least has sex with her before they leave but Eric begs off claiming he is infected to which Ginger replies SHE IS TOO!!! Ooooh Ginger that isn’t good 😦 but as to what relevance that will have we don’t find out this week as the last we see of her is her being unceremoniously dumped off the travel coffin as she screams after Eric. Could that be the last time we get to hear the now infamous Ginger screaming? Guess we will have to wait and see …. Roll opening credits!

The episode picks up where it then spends most of the rest of the hour.  In Sookie’s house.  She is feeling lost and alone and spies what we assume is Alcide’s leather jacket on the chair and she finds Lafayette and James waiting for her. Lala puts her to bed and assures her that he and James will take care of the house and make it respectable for Jackson arriving the next day.  Sookie sleeps right through to the next evening but when she comes downstairs things aren’t quite what she would expect.   Everything is set up for a PARTY!  Yes you read that right!  Jackson and Jenny (well Jenny really) have been prepping all day and they plan on having the whole town over to “celebrate” Alcide’s life rather than “mourn” his passing.  Sookie doesn’t look too impressed but when Bill turns up with flowers (because he had no alcohol at his house which was required as per the invite) she changes her mind and goes to get all dressed up. 

Lettie Mae is annoying as ever and wants to go to the party but the Reverend is smart and knows there will be booze and vamp blood there so it is a no go for Lettie Mae.  That doesn’t stop her though as she doses him up with Benedril (allergy meds) to put him to sleep she can go and do whatever the hell she has it into her crazy head this week needs to be done.

At Sookie’s the party is in full swing an even Bill is dancing … if you can call it that (definitely debatable).  The girls that escaped the Hep V Vamps are having  a blast (except Nicole who is pregnant and can’t drink and seems a little put out by all the weird behavior …. we find out later she is a LOT put out by it all….. isn’t it about time she got killed off …. she’s annoying and you know her and Sam won’t be living HEA) ….. anyway sidetracked … so yes everyone is partying including Jane Bodehouse and that sets Bill off into one of several “Civil War Flashbacks”.   

Now Bill flashbacks (for the most part) are boring and annoying at the best of times but at least normally there is some kind of point that I can fathom out from them.  This weeks flashbacks all seem to center around the same point.  Bill didn’t want to be a part of the Civil War.  He didn’t want to fight, he knew the South was going to lose, and he was more interested in helping the slaves.  UMMMMMM WHAT??????????  So this is a whole new backstory for Bill after SIX SEASONS with NO HINT that he was not a firm believer fighting for the South.  In fact we have been lead over and over to respect what a “Fine Southern Gentleman War Hero” he was and NONE of this rubbish has been entertained.   We see one of the slaves he befriended and was trying to help escape get shot, we see his wife desperately trying to support him and convince one of their *Friends* (fellow noble at least) not to kill him and instead he has to enlist.   All very strange and pretty seemingly pointless and just taking up air time.  I am assuming they are going to somehow link this back to the “Hopeless Hep V War”???? that they are now fighting but UGH definitely wasted air time in my opinion.  The only link so far is that each of the flashbacks has had the ancestor of a current character triggering them.  Blah!

In the middle of the party we stop for a little memorial speech from Jackson which I suppose was nice but really should have been at a funeral.  He says that Sookie was worth it otherwise Alcide wouldn’t have fought for her,  Once we get through that Lettie Mae turns up and Lala tries to get her to leave but she just wants to talk and Sookie lets her (because Sookie is just always soooo nice …. personally I would be on the “get the hell out of my house platform” ) and so we get her remembrance speech about Tara … which STILL ends up pretty much being about her!  Ugh will someone PLEASE kill her already.  I have been over her storyline since season 1 and things haven’t improved. 

Jessica and Andy have a talk outside and Andy makes Jess realize that she is making it harder on him by constantly punishing herself because it won’t let him move on.  When she agrees to help he then says that he is going to propose to Holly …. right there at the party! Now really anywhere else this would probably be a little inappropriate but here it just kinda worked.  We ended up with a really sweet scene…… Sookie let’s Andy use Nan’s ring (which apparently technically was left to Jason but Violet starts by being nice … she doesn’t need a ring …. but then shows her true colors asking “that’s it??” which everyone ignores and is the completely OPPOSITE reaction to Jessica who is gushing away ….. hmmmmmm that isn’t good ) … and off we go for a proposal.  Definitely cute right down to Jason dropping a cushion on the floor for Andy to kneel on that everyone around just ignores.  Even the proposal is done in typical Andy fashion with Holly working it out and saying Yes and then Andy getting flustered and saying she has to wait for him to ask.  Loved it.  BUT my favorite bit was Jason.  He sees Adelyn and Wade and tells them that he doesn’t know if they are fucking or not but it is going to have to stop … right now.   AWESOME!!!! Poor kids looked mortified :D.   Jessica finally looks happy and James wants to take advantage of the moment but Jess wants to stay and party and calls James a wet blanket.  Uh oh … We all know where that is leading.

Sookie is not coping so well with “this much living” and goes upstairs with Arlene for a nice little heart to heart where Arlene says that at night she used to wear Terry’s jacket and pretend it was him.  Uh huh!! Suddenly the jacket at the beginning makes sense….. some more continuity.  Well done writers! We see Jackson lurking outside listening ….. which makes no sense at the time but all will become clear at the end.   Arlene and Sookie are drunk and return the to party and we see Keith again.  Remember Keith … the vamp that saved Arlene? Well there is obviously chemistry there and he references the lovely sexy dreams she has been having.  Hmmm we didn’t get to see them… oh wait yeah … I don’t care.   It was obvious they were going to have a little thing so they might as well get on with it …. but not this week.    

Lafayette goes outside to talk to James and well I am pretty sure everyone can guess what happens next.  Damn those two are so cute together but ummmmm James on the bottom???? I did NOT see that coming.  Totally figured it would be the other way round …. hmmmmmmm lots of thought about that over night and it is STILL bothering me.  Guess James is more of a sub than I pegged him for.  Shame.  Makes him less hot in my book *sigh* ….. oh well …….  Back to the story though and the worst possible outcome happens …… Jessica catches them … full on at it … IN THEIR CAR!! Oh Jessica … really??? What did you expect …. you have been ignoring him for MONTHS now …. but Jessica runs into the house … right near Jason and gets him to rescind James’s invitation leaving him stuck outside.  Jess runs upstairs and Violet gives Jason permission to go after her. Ummmmm not your brightest move there Violet I must say!  

Lafayette joins them a couple of minutes later and points out and that she needs to let him be with someone who loves him if she doesn’t.  Fair enough but we know this is going to cause problems later …….  Jessica and Jason …. alone …. again ….. hmmmmm

Sookie goes looking for Bill and is wandering around with her drunken reduced inhibitions allowing her to “hear” all the nice things people are thinking at the party…. she finds him outside and they share a moment and Bill is wondering about the whole “friends” thing.  This was not done in his time and if we are honest we all know that he loves her.  I am torn because I almost think they belong together (as much as Bill has annoyed me the last few seasons) ….. the last few episodes I see glimpses of the S1 relationship that I loved…. maybe I am getting soppy because the end is so near and I am not quite ready to say goodbye despite the total train wreck it has at times become *sigh*.   OK enough of that (I blame the music) ……. back to the story ……. so Bill goes home and Sookie returns to the party  ……

Just in time to find Lettie Mae who is thinking about Willa and blood and seeing Tara. See we all knew she should have just been thrown out when she first turned up. She NEVER has good motives and she STABS WILLA through the shoulder with a serving knife!! CRAZY BITCH!!! Lafayette comes to which the crazy Lettie Mae away while everyone tries to defuse the now fanged out vampires and are succeeding pretty well until Nicole (UGH did I mention I can’t stand her) get’s up and points out that everyone there is nuts and that “normal” people don’t carry on like this in other towns.   Maybe someone should give her the past 6 seasons to sit through and she would see that really, in the grand scheme of things, this is pretty mild.  Ship her off somewhere Sam …. we all know you have TERRIBLE taste in women!!  She is no good for you .. baby or no baby!!! Possibly the funniest reaction is Jenny (Jackson’s bit of stuff laughing in the corner at it all) … redneck trash to the end that one :D.  So Nicole takes off to go home with Sam and Violet offers to make sure they get home safely.

Now we have Jason and Jessica alone in a room … AND Violet out of the house …. so no prizes for guessing what happens next!! Yes Jessica and Jason are back on …. well at it anyway.  Sex in a chair and they must still have the no full nudity clause for Jessica because we are still not getting a topless shot of her.  Sorry guys :(.  Violet returns while they are in full swing and we are all waiting for the inevitable fireworks and fight ……. but they don’t come! Ummmmm what???  Excuse me???? Violet, after all her threats etc is just going to walk away … Ummmmmmm OKAY????    There has to be more going on that this!  (We actually see in the previews for next week she has decided to fight fire with fire but personally I would prefer fireworks …… bring on the fight!!!) …… sooooo there you have it ….. Weird! 

Away from the party (Which yes I told you took up basically the WHOLE episode),  you have the other (more interesting) storyline of Eric and Pam and the hunt for Sarah Newlin.  They arrive in Dallas and find Amber Mills (Sarah’s sister) and discover she too is a victim of Hep V with the tell tale black veins everywhere.  We learn that Jeremy (Her vampy boyfriend that turned her) has already died and she is just waiting for the same fate but she is happy to take Sarah with her and tells them that Sarah is here in Dallas and will likely be at an upscale political Gala where her parents plan to attend … and Eric and Pam plan on being there!

They are getting ready for the Gala and Pam is all dressed up like a “replublicunt” HA!!! when she tells Eric to strip so he can get ready ….. and we see that his Hep V has spread.  He is now in what they call “Stage 2” (this week anyway .. they are REALLY making these Hep V rules up as they go along) and there is another amazing Eric and Pam moment where he tells her she has to accept he is going to die.  I’m with you Pam!!! Don’t accept it!!! Scriptwriters can find a way to make this right!!! DAMNIT!!!!!  Eric has Pam cover up the ones that will be visible but we don’t get to see Eric’s outfit until the Gala and oh it is worth the wait!!! Cowboy Eric!!! Too Funny!!! Oh it reminds me of Season 2 ….. back in Dallas again … the good parts of S2…. not the weird crazy egg ritual / meat tree type parts lol. 

Pam and Eric embark on their mission to find Sarah via her parents and have made it into the Gala but Pam thinks all the women look the same so is unamused at having to find the mother.  Eric glamours the father but he knows nothing ….. meanwhile we see Sarah find her mother in the ladies room and her mother is not too thrilled to see her.  It doesn’t really matter though because while all this is going on the Yokomoto Samari crew (also known as the Yukuza) are back and are taking out EVERYONE at the party.  Seriously these are the worst group of hired security guards at this party EVER!  One of them doesn’t even have his gun pulled as it is all going down. He deserves to get shot.  Then again they are not discriminating ….. if you are there, and in the way, you are dead.  Kill all the Republicans seems to be the plan of the day for them.  We see Sarah’s father get shot in the head as he doesn’t know where Sarah is (Eric has disappeared at this point) and then we see the Yukuza head towards the bathrooms.  They chase Sarah and her mother and it looks like her mother is about to have a heart attack so Sarah leaves her and not a moment too soon as the Yukuza round the corner and shoot the Mom a few times so no need to worry about the heart attack.  

Sarah runs right into Eric who grabs her by the throat in her moment of panic.  Suddenly the yukuza are right there, the same group that killed his beloved Sylvie so after dropping Sarah he stabs them with their own swords and then rips his teeth out ….no literally …. hand in face and pulls out his whole jaw as the guy dies and walks down the hallway.  AWESOME!!!!! However, fun as that is I don’ think this will be the end of that battle …. to be continued (There were a LOT of those Yukuza guys there)

Back in Bon Temps and the party is over and Sookie heads up to bed to find the jacket from earlier laid out waiting for her.  AHA! So THAT was why Jackson was lurking around there.  Bless …. I suppose that’s quite sweet really.  So Sookie curls up in that and cries herself to sleep while over in the Compton manor Bill is taking a bath …. I know right …. random much? So he gets out and wipes the video and the music is cued up and we are all waiting …. Will Sookie suddenly be behind him …. will it be some bad guy waiting to kill him, Well????? NOPE!!! Worse!!!! Right in the center of his chest we see it ….. the markings of the start of Hep V!!! AHHHHHHHHHH  Now at this point the ONLY person I can remember Bill feeding off recently is Sookie??? What am I missing here???? UGH!!!! Annoying …… lots of things to ponder … well I suppose it takes my mind off of why James was on the bottom ………..

And now we wait until next week!!! On the plus side I have to say I am LOVING the use of the season 1 character soundtrack this season.  It feels right to me and I adore it although it almost pushes home the finality of it and that makes me sad.  Only 5 more episodes and I have no idea what they have in store…. but obviously the whole Hep V thing in our main characters is about to get upped to a while new level.   Who will make it to the end?? Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching and Monday I will be back here to share my thoughts!

V””V

 

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

None (lot’s of death but none of it main cast)

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie

My Favorite Lines From “Lost Cause”

• Pam  (To Amber) – ”I like her …. I like you” … Amber – “is it alright if I haven’t made up my mind about you yet”  Pam “Yeah .. I really like her!”
• Eric – ”You don’t know us sweetheart – we can be assholes”
• Violet- “I have had about 100 boyfriends die on me over the years and I remember how painful the first ones were”
• Jackson – ”You can’t die a hero if you don’t have a righteous cause” 
• Jason – “I don’t know if you all are fucking or not but if you are it is going to have to stop … right now”
• Pam – “Oh My God …… I’m a Republicunt!!!!!”
• Sookie – “You might wanna dial down your sexy a notch” 
• Arlene  – “I have to go make tinkle ….. because you know … I am a human!”
  
• Sookie – “Thank you for seeing me the way I can’t see myself sometimes”
• Pam – “How??? All these bitches look the same???”

True Blood Season 7 Ep 4 – “Death Is Not The End” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season ….  and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

Still with me? I warn you …. this is a long one ….. Right then here we go!! Wow can you believe we are on the 4th episode already? That means we are almost halfway through.  Not liking that.  Neither did I really care for the beginning of this week’s episode, which was of course dealing with the big death last week.  We have Sookie calling Jackson to tell him his son is dead and then (far more moving) we have Jason calling Hoyt to tell him that Maxine has passed.  Poor Hoyt …. and poor Jason <3.  They did a really good job here what with Jason having grown up with Hoyt but Jessica’s glamour still working its vampire magic. Awwwwwww. Wonder what will happen when he comes back to Bon Temps.  I guess we will see ……… After the phone call Jason has decided he is done with everything but Sookie gives him the “Man Up” speech because Andy is gone (to look after Holly) and so he is all that is left.  Well who would have thought THAT would have been the case 6 seasons ago???  ***Opening Credits ….. I still love this song ………***

As with most episodes, by far the best thing in it were the moments with Eric and Pam and in particular the flashbacks.  I am loving getting more of their history together, especially when it involves 80’s and 90’s flashbacks.  Oh the memories …. but I digress ….. We start on a plane with Eric and Pam heading to Baton Rouge because Pam has decided that is where Sarah is likely to have reached out.  Eric is not amused by this and stops feeding on the lovely Air Hostess to demand they go to Shreveport to get Willa.   Eric and Pam are so great with the way they play off each other but Eric lets it slip that he is dying which Victoria (pretty Air Hostess) is unamused about as she is now going to lose her job.  I know it’s wrong but I LOVE that neither Eric nor Pam care one bit!! YES!!! This is the Eric and Pam we want to see.  The looks they share, their chemistry is just awesome…..  I love them!  

We now get the first of several flashbacks but as they are all related and are BY FAR the best bit of this entire episode I am going to put them all together …. because honestly? I want to lol.

Remember last week Pam and Eric got taken by the Yokomoto corporation after they dispensed with Sylvie back in 1986?  Well this flashback picks up right after that with Pam and Eric being “released” in Shreveport in a parking lot that will look very familiar to all the fans.  Yes this is where they get Fangtasia. But wait …… it is not the Fangtasia we know and love …. it is …. a VIDEO RENTAL STORE lmao!!! Complete with extra porn section in the basement!!!   Oh Pam is so disgusted by the whole thing it is hilarious!! We get to meet The Magister (remember him) and we learn that he made Eric Sheriff (Something Eric actually looks rather pleased about) because he wants to be able to keep an eye on him.  They learn that this punishment (running the store) is basically a forever thing at this point and when The Magsiter tosses Pam the keys she ignores them as they smack her in the chest and fall to the floor.  Oh it was so well done!! Bravo!!!  Now pay attention here …. The Magister throws out that there is an abandoned, walled up tunnel behind the basement …… FULL OF HISTORY he says ….. but that will be VERY important later.   ****OK mini side rant here ….. do we have different writers doing the flashback things?  They are so awesome with the details and the remembering things, and adding in little “extras” …. where is that in the MAIN show??? Hmmmmmm??? Continuity has just LEFT THE BUILDING with pretty much everything else…….. UGH OK I’m done for the moment … back to the flashbacks …..****

We jump to 1996 and poor Pam is STILL stuck working in that horrid little video store which is now upgrading to DVDs.   In walks a nerdy looking brunette with a list of obscure vampire movies she wants to watch.  Pam is actually impressed and the selections and half listens as the girl goes on and on about the course she is taking about monsters being misunderstood.   Suddenly out walks Eric …. in full 90’s boy band style ….with the background music of “I would die for you” …..  LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!!!! And then I realize …. IT’S GINGER!!!! HA!!!! Without the blonde hair and minus the screaming I didn’t see it at first….. and well she just about dies …. right there on the spot.  Jaw on the floor …. ummmmm yes that might have been my reaction too …. WOW …. ummmmm where was I ……. oh yes so Ginger meets Eric and decides she wants to work there … and well the rest is history ….. actually we get a little more history …. and I LOVE it!!

Fast forward to 2006 and the vamps are coming out of the coffin and we see Ginger (looking much more like the Ginger we all know) getting out of a hearse, with a big chair, and heading into the video shop where they are still working.   Pam is waiting for her and is unamused by the chair until Ginger lays out the whole plan for Fangtasia, right down to Eric sitting up on the throne we all know and love.  Pam loves the idea …. and totally steals is – glamouring Ginger into thinking it was Pam’s idea in the first place.  Awesome!!!!!   Flash forward to Eric and Pam back on the plane and Eric is smiling and lovingly calls Pam a Bitch ….. but she says “but you still love me” ….. and he looks at her and just says “always”.  Awwwwwwww ❤ such a look. Just perfect!!!  I’m telling you I would watch a whole series just about these too!!!! FANGTASTIC!!!! 

Right then back to the rest of what is going on …….. Sookie, Jason, and Sam head over to see Andy and Holly and find Coby and Lisa who Sookie decides to go talk to.  Lisa is moaning that everyone is treating them like they are stupid but they know things are wrong.  After a heart to heart with the (now not so little) kids Sookie promises that she will bring their Mom back.  UGH Stupid Sookie!!! You know better than to make promises like that! Especially with the kill count this season.   Anyway Sookie knows that Holly knows what happened and that it was just glamoured away so Sookie heads in to fix that. Remember her little trick with the Black Eyes back in Season 2? Yup she can MAKE you remember and she does just that with Holly.  Oh it isn’t pretty and leaves Holly a snivelling mess for poor Andy to deal with but they don’t have time for that!! Sookie does leave him with a piece of advice ….”We like to be held”…. well OK then!!!  So they know where the survivors are and they have a plan! Well Sookie has a plan …. she is going to Bills …. in the middle of the day ….. Jason and Sam …. they have to go tell Rosie that Kevin is dead.

Staying with Jason and Sam for a moment, Sam has a little melt down and thinks he is going to go to Fangtasia now and rescue Nicole (STUPID SAM!!!!!) but Jason manages to stop him (by threatening to shoot him in the head) and they eventually get to Rosie’s and she is not happy to see them and even less happy with the news.  She makes them promise that they will avenge Kevin which, of course, they promise to do.

Over at Bill’s house Jessica and James are fighting over the fact that Jessica isn’t healing because she isn’t eating.  Apparently it has been months.  Hmmmmm they do like to change how long these vamps can go without feeding.  James goes to get Bill and Bill tries to convince her but is not doing a very good job.  Sookie turns up in the middle of it all and decides that Jessica can feed off of her.  Jessica isn’t amused because as she points out Sookie is a fairy but Sookie says she trusts her.   Sookie gets Bill and James to leave and then lays one of the best guilt trips on Jessica that I have heard in ages.  Basically Sookie doesn’t care what is going on with Jessica and her life but she needs help and Sookie has been good to Jessica so Jessica needs to suck it up and help her!   Amazingly THIS WORKS but she won’t feed off Sookie and so they send for James’s human … the wonderful Lafayette!!!! 

This leads to a wonderful scene! Nelson Ellis is OUTSTANDING this week with just the right amount of sass, sympathy, and use of the word “Hookah” to convince Jessica that he is a bad person too.  He misses Jesus and it is OK not to be perfect and not to forgive yourself but you have to keep going.   Add to that the looks that James and Lala share and yes I will admit it. My heart melted.  Awwwww <3.  Sorry Jessica I am routing for them to hook up….. the sooner the better. 

Sookie is plotting with Bill but he points out that generally the vampires around are not really going to be invested in going to a fight at Fangtasia with the H Vamps.  They have everything to lose and nothing to gain.  When asked why he is going he explains it is because he owes Sookie everything.  You know Bill …… when you act like season 1 Bill you aren’t so bad after all.  So Sookie decides Bill needs to eat ……because he needs to be at his strongest to fight ……. but  you know personally I think Sookie just wanted a good bite.  Obviously missing it having been with a wolf for 6 months.  Guessing a wolf bite wouldn’t be so appealing lol

So night has fallen and the troops have gathered to plan their attack.  Hmmmm troops might be a tad optimistic sounding as we have Sookie, Bill, Jason, Sam, Jessica, James, Violet, and 2 of James’s band mates (also vamps) Michael and Keith. Jason tries to give a rousing speech but compares it to Normandy and obviously doesn’t get much response as Normandy left beaches stained with allied blood ….. but fear not!! Eric and Pam have arrived.  Obviously looking for Willa (well on the pretense of looking for Willa) and Pam bitches that Sookie is there.  Glad to see that they are at least consistent with that but Eric does listen and “calls” Willa.  Eric, however, obviously still loves Sookie and takes a moment alone with her to discover what trouble she has gotten herself into this time.  He is appropriately disgusted about her “wolf” relationship but drops it when he sees she is hurting.  The time between them is touching and you can see how much Eric still cares and it would seem Sookie does too.  Perhaps the triangle is about to come back.  I was sure the writers were heading towards Sookie and Bill ….. but who knows.  Hmmmmmm need to ponder that. Also need to ponder the lack of Eric or Pam making any kind of negative comment to Jason about Sarah being alive.   Pam may secretly be grateful at this point as it is fueling Eric’s will to live …. but Eric … he looked pissed last week.  I can’t believe there wouldn’t even be a passing jibe??? Ugh!  Damn Writers!

Willa arrives and is not a happy babyvamp.   She wants to talk about her abandonment NOW!!! But Eric has other plans and uses the old fail safe “as you maker I command you” trick and later it is 😀

So off to battle they go …. the crew above with the additions of Eric, Pam, and Willa but Eric actually has a plan.  Remember that bricked up tunnel?  Well they are going to bust in and rescue the prisoners that way!!  Awesome!!! Except when they get there Eric has pretty much lost all his strength and after a pitiful few attempts Bill smashes down the wall in one punch …. ummmmm NO!!!!!!! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!! UGH!!! That is SO WRONG!!! On SOOOOOOO many levels wrong!!!! So let me ask you this? If H Vamps are so weak even in the early stages (he is level 1) and HE has just FED well and recently …… why the hell are the other vamps any problem at all?? You have a shifter and a bunch of healthy vamps?  What the hell writers???? Make your mind up!!!! STUPID!!!!!

Anyway Sam goes in first (as a rat) and transforms and freaks Arlene and Jane (which is mildly amusing …. although I would have had Arlene making a comment about Sam being naked ….. but maybe that is me being a perv) ……. so prisoners found Sam lets them know that vamps are coming in to rescue them and they need to TRUST them.  The 3 prisoners are not too amused but seriously at this point what choice do they have? Well as Sam scurries back off as a rat it would seem that they might be too late for one of them because here comes an H Vamp and he is hungry!!  Back at the tunnel entrance it is decided that Pam and Bill will go rescue the humans (because Eric is so week) but by the time they get there Arlene is already upstairs about to be eaten.   The other 2 saved Bill decides to go after Arlene but Pam gives him a couple of words of advice …… not to try too hard to be a hero .. because she says it is never going to happen with Sookie the way he wants … not tonight …. not ever.  Hmmmmmm foreshadowing?  Certainly interesting to say the least. 

But Bill is not the only one with a plan.  Eric has decided to go through the front door, claiming he needs asylum and he brings his own human (no prizes for guessing who that is …..) Now apparently despite their apparent apathy previously, these H Vamps do have a thing for fairy blood after all ….. not that they know what it is but it is Sookie smelling so good that tempts them to let him in.   Arlene is close to death on the table and Eric is trying to buy time with the crazy H Vamps who amazingly enough all seem together enough to hold it together for this little chit chat.  Come on cavalry where are you??

Oh wait …. unexpected help? Problems? Ummmm a bit of both really as the remainder of the “Wanna be Justice League Crew” (Wanna be Mayor, Kenya, Rosie, annoying mouthy girl, and another guy along with a few others ) pull in to the parking lot armed with a Molotov cocktail. FIRE!!!! Just as our hero team is coming up the back way.  Well all hell erupts.  As the vamps go flying out the front door a bunch are picked off by the “Wanna Be League” all armed with guns and wooden bullets until a few break through to kill most of the humans off (yup none of you will be missed).   This gives the other vamps time to get out the back way and we get to see a matrix style, all hell break loose battle between the vamps and it seems that all the H Vamps get killed off and our team escapes unscathed.

That being said Sookie is trapped inside a burning Fangtasia with a dying Arlene and Eric unable to help as his infected blood (I’m assuming) is no good for healing.  She tells him to get a “Healthy” vamp.  Now why he doesn’t just “Call” Willa is anybody’s guess …… but he doesn’t …. instead he’s about to leave when Bill appears and stakes a rogue H Vamp by ripping off one of the handles from behind the bar (Season 1 Longshadow anyone????).  Pam comes in with a fire extinguisher and deals with the fire issue and gets a wonderful look from Eric (I am telling you this week was just full of them) and then she hears them outside about to throw in another flaming bottle and rushes out, snatches the bottle and sets the guy on fire.  Awesome!! 

Bill is about to give Arlene his blood when he feels Jessica in trouble so leaves to help her and Eric comes to the rescue bringing Keith.  Now Arlene is seeing Terry and hearing Terry (although for a moment Terry is the evil H Vamp but Jason shoots that one … well done Jason)  and for a moment I really thought that Arlene was about to be the next victim of this season’s slaughter run as we get to see Terry too but he tells Arlene to stay and she starts to come round.  Now she shares a little look with Keith the vampire.  Hmmmmmmm is that going to be something I wonder.  Lots to think on this episode.

We end with it being confirmed that all the H Vamps are in fact goo.  And judging by the number of bodies it looks like all the “Wanna be Justice League” are dead too with the main cast notables being Kenya and Rosie.  Pam is shouting for Eric and for a moment you wonder if perhaps he is one of the goo piles and we missed it ….. but fear not.  Eric is in a car eating Rosie.   Well Rosie there were worse ways you could have died.  Eric returns to the bar and shares a beautiful look with Sookie ….. and the credits roll …… 

And now we wait until next week!!!  Only 6 installments left…. but already things seem to be wrapping up faster than I would have expected so I am hoping they will focus on the hunt for Sarah and hopefully a cure for Eric?!  Who will make it to the end?? Only thing for sure is that Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching!

V””V

Main Cast Death Count This Episode

Kenya
Rosie

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – OK definitely Dead … Pam says she felt her die whilst in Morocco – that makes TB 1 – VLD -0 BLAH!
Kevin
Maxine Fortenberry
Alcide
Kenya
Rosie

My Favorite Lines From “Death Is Not The End”

• Jackson – ”He loved the fuck out of you Sookie”
• Pam – “I’m sorry …. did we fuck and I blocked it out”
• Eric- “Welcome to our shithole”
• Bill – “I Owe You Everything”
• Lafayette – “Step aside Hookah ….. give a real hookah a shot”
• Pam – “Ginger – look at yourself and look at me …. who has better taste?”
• Ginger – “Eric Northman is nothing if he isn’t fucking  sex on a throne” 
• Eric – “Pam tells me you wrote a book where you claim no longer to be an asshole …. is it true?”
  
• Pam – “She’s like a fucking fungus that just won’t go away”
• Eric – “You will not drink her blood …. you will sip it … like a nice glass of barbaresco”

True Blood Season 7 Ep 2 – “I Found You” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Well my fellow True Blood Fans here we are again ……The beginning of the end ….. The final season ….  and here I am again so  let the spoilers and snarking begin!  For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season )…  let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated.  I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to and for the most part I skip over a lot that doesn’t interest me.   My favorite lines are listed at the bottom, assuming I found any … as the seasons have progressed the numerous gems have started to feel more like trying to find needles in a haystack  (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

Still with me? Right then here we go!!  At the end of last week we had … well not a whole lot really. Sookie was preaching in the church and there was no cliffhanger to speak of.

This week opens NOT in Bon Temps at all but rather somewhere exotic with ERIC standing by a window and Jason coming to find him … wait Jason???? Ummmmmm OK Brian Buckner I see where this is going and sure enough insert Eric / Jason sexy type dream sequence.   Not bad …. I never realized how short Jason was ….. and it was enough man on man action that my husband was groaning lol but over all other than putting Eric back on the screen it seemed kinda pointless. Kudos to them though ….. it was believable.  Great chemistry 😀  The look Eric gave when he grabbed Jason by the throat and threw him to the chair?? Ummmmmm yes please!!!!  Jason is crazy as ever and you never know what what is going to come out of his mouth so that was kinda fun and Eric can just stand there and look pretty …. that works.  I’m going to be sad if they kill Jason off… poor Jason .. he was on my watch list last season as one of the most likely to die …. would hate to see him survive that only to die this season :(.   That being said ….. with this happening BEFORE the credits it certainly woke me up …… but that was a highlight … it is pretty much ALL down hill from here (Except a brief minute at the end but you will have to wait for that). …. Oh and Jason waking from his dream in the Church … hilarious!!

So Eric is not dead …. shocker …. yes well we all knew he would be appearing and his name is back in the credits so that was all obviously just to try and mess with bloggers like me.  Rutina Wesley is now absent from said credits (despite making a brief appearance this week)  so I guess well played? If this is the best “Game” you have for us bloggers Brian Buckner you get a C- Must Try Harder.  You know if they show wasn’t falling apart in front of our eyes we would have more SHOW stuff to focus on.

Right then on with the rest of the episode that can pretty much be set into 3 little boxes, none of which I would personally bother to open!  This whole episode is basically set during the day which means we get little to know vamp interaction and the stuff we do is from Hep V vamps we know little about and care about the same amount!  We start with most of the town together and Sookie realizing that no one knows what to do but she has a plan because she found a body in the woods.  Yup at this point nobody even asks why this is the first time this is coming up *sigh* ……. Anyway this leads to the decision that the box 1 action will consist of Sookie, Jason, Alcide, Sam, and Andy all leaving to investigate the body.  Box 2 action will consist of the adventures over at Fangtasia with the Hep V Vamps and their well known prisoners, and Box 3 will be the “Wanna Be Justice League” from last week and the rest of the town that are “sorting things out” including Lettie Mae, Lafayette (Briefly) and Adelyn.

BOX 1 – Sookie, Jason, Alcide, Sam, and Andy  and their out of town adventure.  They start by going back to the body Sookie found and getting an address off her license.  Jason and Andy so a bit of very unconvincing police work and then after trying to call the mayor and sheriff of the other town (Yes they know their numbers … not they aren’t saved because they dial them in …. *rolls eyes at the stupidity*) And off they go on their road trip to Saint Alise.  When they arrive they find is a totally deserted place with everything boarded up, spray painted messages everywhere with things like FEMA HELP and SOS and NO signs of anything living (or Unliving).

They find a mass grave filled with the remains on the town, at least those that they assume weren’t taken for snacks on the go….. as Sookie puts it they were either “killed or tooken”.    They manage to find the dead woman’s house and Jason is able to use “Pizza Forensics” to establish that they have been gone about 2 1/2 days.  For those not familiar with this tactic it involves eating left of pizza found on a table.  Must have been good because as the investigation continues he continues eating.

Sookie finds the bedroom and a diary and we get to hear her read the diary entries (Which are from 2010 and 2011 although happening just a couple of days ago so I guess that is where we are in the True Blood universe date wise).   We learn that the dead girl  had a fling with a vamp just like Sookie right down to the trip to Fangtasia, and they thought it was love.  Some great flashbacks to S1 ….. remember S1 …. when this show was awesome beyond belief and we thought nothing would ever match it *sigh* ….. anyway we learn that as we thought the vamps came, destroyed everyone and everything, and didn’t even spare a baby.  I think this was supposed to be dramatic and hard hitting but I’m afraid by this point in this week’s episode all I could think was hmmmmm so it it is 2011.  You know that this all making Sookie think about Bill ……. Ooooh Alcide I knew a wolf just wasn’t going to hack it Mwahahahahahahaha.  So after all that they go back to Bon Temps (after Alcide having a moment in the car where he says they could just keep driving…… UGH Alcide you REALLY suck! And not in the fun vampy way!)

 

BOX 2 – The Hep V Vamps holed up at Fangtasia with Holly, Arlene, Nicole and Jane.  The vamps aren’t happy that one of their own killed Kevin and ate him all by themselves.  Blood is short and they need to learn to share.   Apparently these Hep V Vamps don’t sleep during the day much, or if they do they have a watch set for 15 minutes to keep waking them up? Not sure what the hell is going on with that but it is all rather pointless.  They are all hungry, they are irritated because Bon Temps had vampires protecting them, oh and they don’t seem to get the bleeds.  Actually no vamps seem to get the bleeds by staying up anymore.  Jessica is up during the day (no bleeds even though as she hasn’t fed recently to the point where her own fang marks on her arm from feeding Adelyn aren’t healing?), We see Willa up in the day (although admittedly not for a prolonged period), anyway I digress.  So yes Hep V Vamps are hungry and they have a system in which they give each other titles…. like Reaper.  The reaper is the one that goes to fetch the prisoner and bring them up to feed the others (preferably without eating them all on the way).  The reaper that went for Kevin failed and ate him all so a new reaper is appointed.

This reaper is apparently a teacher that used to teach Arlene and Holly’s kids.  Now this is important because she recognizes Arlene and so chooses someone else to eat.  Later they manage to talk to her and come up with a plan for them to escape. On a side note when the girls are discussing that they know her Nicole comments that she is a reaper?  Ummmmmmm yes well they just made that up for this episode … guess they wanted to make the most of it.  Seriously writers …. PLEASE sort it out!!! Continuity FAIL!

The teacher works out if she is the sleep monitor she can rescue Arlene and the others. So she gets her watch (set at 14 1/2 minutes) and she goes down to get them letting them know they have 12 minutes to escape.  She says she will need to feed on one of them before she will be strong enough and Arlene volunteers.   The Vamp says it has to be the femoral artery because if they are caught the bite marks need to be hidden.  Arlene is unamused but agrees (I mean really what choice does she have?) and vamp goes in for a bite.  First bite seems OK but then it all gets weird ……. suddenly the vamp stops feeding, looks up and the veins in her face are deteriorating fast and her eyes glaze and she dives back at Arlene’s leg and starts munching like her undead life depends on it … which I am guessing it did because suddenly she is vamp goo.  Now was it just her Hep V finally getting her? We know Arlene isn’t infected so her blood wouldn’t be tainted and make her worse that quickly …… OR are we going to find out somehow that Arlene has something in her that kills the Hep V vamps? I mean they have said no new big bad villains this season but that doesn’t mean no new supes?? Hmmmmm will have to think some more on that.  Either way they are all still trapped and now covered in goo and we will have to see what happens next week. 

BOX 3 – The “Wanna Be Justice League” from last week and the rest of the town that are “sorting things out” including Lettie Mae, Lafayette (Briefly) and Adelyn.  Let’s start with Lafayette.  He gets a visit from Lettie Mae to “check on him” but really she just wants some V.  Yup she’s an addict again just swapping booze for V.  Lafayette won’t help her so she gets insulting and leaves.  Anyone else wish she would just leave for good?

Back at Merlottes (Sorry Bellefleurs) everyone is cleaning up so they can all keep busy … until along comes the   “Wanna Be Justice League” to cause problems and with all the “good people” off on a field trip they are able to convince all the people there (with a bit of help from a freezer full of dead bodies) that they need to take the law into their own hands.  They talk about Sam being a dog and Mrs Fortenberry says she saw him turn from a bear once by her trash and then proceeds to call him a bear/dog from then on.  I did like that someone asked her why she in fact voted for Sam to be Mayor if she had seen that to which she didn’t have an answer.   Anyway they all decide they are going to protect themselves and start breaking up things for stakes until Adelyn “overhears ” Rosie realize that there are guns at the police station. Adelyn takes Wade and rushes over to warn Kenya and things seem to be going well until the rest of the town gets there and convinces Kenya that they SHOULD be doing something (generally with the use of you are a black woman always overlooked and this is your chance to do something).  Adelyn gets scared and blasts them with her fairy light and it is all down hill from there.

Jessica wakes sensing Adelyn is in a whole lot of trouble but a glance at her watch lets her know it is the middle of the day and sunny too so she is trapped.  She tries calling Sookie but Sookie’s phone is still in the woods from last week.  UGH Sookie you are an idiot!  So there is nothing that she can do is wait … and wait and wait ……poor Jessica 😦

At the station they all play with the guns and waste a ton of ammunition but the funniest thing for me was seeing Mrs Fortenberry getting all into shooting things (minus bullets).  Anyone remember when she was all black eyed and playing the Wii at Bills?  Ha yes that was what it reminded me of!

In another part of town Lettie Mae burns her wrist and runs it under cold water and then realizes there is a way for her to get more vampire blood and she burns the hell out of herself and then rushes over to wake Willa, who almost kills her being woken in the middle of the day, but instead catches herself and then heals Lettie Mae who goes off on a nice little V induced high.  She sees Tara up on a cross, dressed in white, with a big yellow snake wrapped round her and she is saying something.  All very strange and I am sure it means something but I have no idea what and I really can’t be bothered to try and figure that mess out.

Jessica is still stressing about Adelyn but now it is later in the day and she is trying to get ready to leave when Andy comes home.  After realizing that Jessica did not in fact EAT Adelyn he listens and finds out that Jessica knows Adelyn is in trouble.  Now here is my issue ….. she doesn’t know WHERE she is?  The whole point of her drinking the blood last week AND the clip they even showed in the recaps THIS week said … I will ALWAYS know how to find you.  So now she has to be out of the house …… HUH???? This makes no sense.  More rules not working because it isn’t convenient for them to be working.  Anybody have any other ideas.  UGH This show is pissing me off this week.

With the three boxes done there are only 2 little bits to add on.  Sookie and Alcide return from their road trip and Sookie sends Alcide for a shower so she can sneak out and run across the cemetery to Bills house so she can ask him if he could still find her if she was in trouble.  Ooooohhhhh any excuse Sookie ………

BUT the final moments this week had everyone gasping (OK had me gasping).  Pam finally gets to find Eric in France and contrary to speculation he was not burned up and recovering like Russell, instead things are much, MUCH worse.  We get to see Eric looking tired and resting in a chair as he looks at Pam , who is crying, and says “You Found Me” ……. awwwww … and then we see ….. those tell tale black veins in the center of his chest ….. ERIC HAS HEP V …….. ROLL CREDITS …. NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN YOU BRIAN BUCKNER!!!! Finally something interesting on the screen after AN HOUR of crap and CREDITS!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR  But it begs the question are they actually going to kill him off for good? I mean all the threats of I won’t watch next season really hold no water any more ……. SO NOT GOOD!!!!

UGH ….. and now we wait until next week!!!  The previews for next week look a LOT more promising than this weeks episode was and so with certain mixed emotions I both want to watch and avoid these final 8 installments …. I know there will be tears ….. Who will make it to the end???  But  honestly I’m not fooling anyone even myself ….. Sunday at 9 I WILL be watching!

V””V

Main Cast Death Count This Episode
None  

Main Cast Death Count This Series 

Tara – – Hmmmmmm Looking more like it may have been for real.  I’m shocked!
Kevin 

 

My Favorite Lines From “I Found You”

• Jason– “You’d play the whole Lone Rider – I’m an island”
• Arlene – “I did not survive 4 lousy husbands, my serial killer boyfriend and the sort of suicide of my love Terry  to die in the basement of a vampire bar!”
• Jason – “Sometimes not being clever makes you a better detective” (Hands over a Starbucks Card instead of a License lol)
• Lafayette– “I’m not a big fan of Jesus’ work but that is some epic fucking timing”
• Pam – “Un Fucking Believable”
• Sookie – “If I got myself in some serious shit would you be able to feel me?”

True Blood Season 7, News, Thoughts, and Spoilers!! V””V

So I am sure since Sunday’s episode many of you, like me, have been scouring the web to see if you can get any news on True Blood Season 7.  Well finally an interview with Brian Buckner (Current HBO True Blood Showrunner) has been released and so I thought I would share my thoughts and feelings about it.  (*Original Interview is linked at the bottom of the page*)

Firstly the thing that most people want to know.  Is Eric dead?  Well Brian is saying he is definitely not gone.  Whilst he refuses to admit outright that he will be fine he does say he has no intention of removing him from our screens.  I don’t think for many of us this is going to be a big revelation.  The whole scene was so ani-climatic that my husband, barely looked across to see if I was bothered.  Now you have to realise that various points in the True Blood saga certain scenes turn me to a blubbering wreck, and not just the first time through either.  Godric meeting the sun, Eric releasing Pam, and now this season Nora dying in Eric’s arms …. all guaranteed sob fests.  This scene barely had me raising an eyebrow.  I had already written several escape scenarios for him even before HBO was able to post the 6 months jump ahead sign. (Some of these are discussed in more detail in my finale recap – HERE ).  Basically Eric will be fine, and will be back, and I am pretty sure Pam will be with him.

With that out the way let us move on to the whole Hep V thing.  Now here is where I have a HUGE issue with Brian and it makes me wish Alan Ball would come back.  Do you remember back in the good old days of Season 1 where there were SO MANY hidden meanings that many of them wouldn’t become clear until later? There were even books written that you could, if you were obsessive enough, work out what was going to happen to each character based on the color of their clothes!!!  One of the best things about this show was that you could either just watch it, and take the entertainment at face value, or for people like me, you could hunt for the hidden meanings, look for the extra layers, and find many like-minded people to banter ideas around with.  Apparently we are taking our ideas a little too far for them, there is no conspiracy with Lettae Mae being out to poison Tara …. bloggers like myself cooked that one up all by ourselves.  Well can you blame us?  As drama and cliffhangers go we weren’t really given much to work with.

Now many such people, myself included, have been very upset this season by the blatant “flaunting” of the rules and it almost seemed as if, at times, they were just making it up to suit the storyline in that moment. Well  it turns out THEY WERE!!! ….. and I quote “In seasons past – I’m not going to point to any one of them – we took some massive swings, not knowing where we were going. That’s the nature  of what we do. In this case, I don’t believe we bit off more than we can chew“.  Well that explains a lot then.  All the times we were asking where the thought process was for things ….. turns out there just wasn’t one.  Throw it out there and we will deal with it as and when we can …. if we have to change a few things that we already said … well so be it.   WOW! Totally sold out then!! That to me just really sums up how the writers feel about this show that we love.  A show that was so different when it aired that it caught the attention of vampire lovers all over the world, a show that now have become so mainstream for the most part that I have heard Vampire Diaries be described as more entertaining for the real vampire fans.  We stick with it, we moan, but secretly we are all hoping that they will take a turn back to earlier seasons, maybe open one of the books that the show was inspired from (just not the newest one … for the love of Cain leave that one WELL alone) ….. or as I suggested on the post I got the information from …. LET ME AT IT!!!!!! V””V

MY answer to the ORIGINAL post listed below …. “I think many bloggers would like to offer their services to the writers. I am especially disgusted to read that they “hadn’t thought this Hep V thing through”.  It is actually one of my complaints this week that they need to come up with a proper set of rules for this.  I miss the  old S1 True Blood where everything DID have a meaning and it was only in re-watching, possibly a couple of seasons later, that the clues that  were there became clear.  THAT was clever writing!  None of this “throw  something on screen and see where it goes”.  Supernatural lovers generally like the rules to be adhered to.  We are pretty adaptable as  to what is acceptable (for the most part) between shows and books as  long as the writers STICK TO THEM.  Continuity!  With so many fans it really shouldn’t be hard.  Give a couple of them a chance to read through the scripts (with non disclosures signed obviously).  I assure you it would result in a far better season of TV! V””V

Information obtained from Brian Bucker’s Interview with Michael Ausiello. Read original interview  HERE

True Blood Season 6 Ep 8 – “Dead Meat” Synopsis/Review … MAJOR SPOILERS! V””V

Right then True Blood fans let the spoilers and snarking begin! For those of you new to the me for the True Blood season let me start with my normal disclaimer …. BLAH BLAH BLAH … my spoiler reviews are long, detailed and opinionated. I speculate, bitch and generally focus on the points that I want to. My favorite lines are listed at the bottom (feel free to tell me any you liked that I didn’t use) and sometimes I add in random musings just because!

I am going to start by saying I think this was, perhaps, my least favorite episode so far this season.  For me there was way to much Shifter stuff, Pack problems, Terry trauma, and Fairy fuss!! Overall I found it to be rather dull, especially considering the teaser that we got to see last week, but hope that there is at least some kind of reason for this stuff and possibly an excuse …… I mean explanation from some pretty GLARING continuity errors!!!

We start this week very briefly seeing Eric dealing with Nora’s death and by dealing I mean basically saying screw you Billith I am not helping you or your stupid cause. You failed to save Nora so now I will do my own thing even if you float me around the ceiling like a kite and act like you are a big bad vampire at the end of the day you are just Bill and you are weak!  And Bill proves him right and ends up letting him go.  One of the better moments of this week’s episode but sadly over before the opening credits roll with Bill “slamming” (worst door slam ever)  the door behind Eric as he takes off into the night.   Now at this point hopes are high that Eric is going to be bad and vengeance driven this episode but sadly we see very little of him other than now and his reappearance at the end.  Hey at least I am warning you now … I sat through the whole episode to learn this!

Credits done and we go to Alcide and his little pack dilemma.  Yes I know I don’t really care either but hey it was in there.  So Rikki has Nicole and Mom all tied up and presents them to Alcide as very much not dead and then when Alcide reminds her that he is in fact packmaster Rikki challenges him to a fight … to the death. She even manages to get a couple of seconds … the little bitch that they had the three way with and … ummmmmm well a very strange looking blonde reminding me yet again why wolves are just not my thing.   Stupid fight where Alcide kicks both their asses (yep the girls cheat) and whilst I would normally be completely against any man hitting a woman … Rikki really did ask for it … and she is a wolf … and oh yes I don’t care but PLEASE get this story over with.  So they fight and Rikki loses but we don’t actually know whether Alcide kills her or not.  Well OK we do because it’s Alcide .. and even asshole Alcide that has been around this season won’t be doing that.

Over at Vamp Camp Willa wants to try and save Jason from being Violet’s chew toy but Tara talks her out of it. At least Tara seems to have a handle on the whole vamp hierarchy now …. or maybe it is just the jail hierarchy that she has the hang of.  Either way it was a smart decision on her part.  Violet has decided that Jason is “hers” and apparently this to her means forever. A concept Jason is not too thrilled about but hey at least she isn’t going to be passing him around for favors so bonus for him.  Honestly I am bored with her already. Even her whole I am a real medieval catholic with real values speech was just annoying.  The only amusing part was when Pam asked to talk to her while she was feeding (in what appeared to be a morgue drawer???… no idea why THAT was in the general population room) but that amusement was down to Pam’s attitude and not hers.  Overall I hope she dies because otherwise I see another long drawn out Crystal time situation occurring and we certainly don’t need that cropping up again!

Back in Bon Temps Sookie is at the graveyard and yet again seems to have a complete handle on what she can do with her powers right down to telepathically talking to Warlow (I am dropping the Ben bit)  before she returns to Fairy land (which this week seems to have sparkly things everywhere almost like icicles you hang on a Christmas tree everywhere) and ties him back to the gravestone with some vines.  You know if he has enough control to make the decision to do that …. and then she is going to feed him when she gets there anyway …. why bother with the tieing him up in the first place.  Oh wait I got it …. you didn’t tie him up before you left last time because it wasn’t needed for the story … but this week it is so just tie him up and leave him that way ….. indefinitely.  Yep GREAT plan *rolls eyes*.    Anyway I am jumping ahead a bit … so they are there and Warlow makes a nice point that Bill is a liar and so just because he says he won’t kill Warlow after he saves the vamps doesn’t mean it is true and he is going to want a little more assurance, so if he helps the vamps Sookie has to become his fairy vampire princess bride.  Sounds fair enough to me! But Sookie needs time to think about it and zaps herself back to Bon Temps where Eric is waiting, hiding behind a tree, and sees her just appear.  Once she leaves Eric goes to the spot she just came from and waves his arm around obviously trying to sense what is there.  Whether Eric can tell or not is unsure but Warlow certainly can as the whole realm he is in suddenly goes dark.  Interesting ……. OK not really … it is exactly what happened when Bill was near in season 4 with the whole fairy thing.  At least time doesn’t seem to be distorted now … or maybe the writers just forgot that part……Oooooh maybe Warlow can control it … what??? They are making up new rules every single week with no regard to what has happened before!!! Almost as bad as the last Sookie book!!! (Hey they make a reference to it in a bit so why can’t I).

Back to Vamp Camp and Jessica and James are basking in the afterglow of their little fling last week. They really are kinda cute together. James is by far the most interesting new vampire for me this season although even he annoys me this week. I guess when Jason got escorted off they were just left in the room and no one thought to check.  Well OK then. But it doesn’t last long as just as they are about to have a little more fun the guards burst in….. of course no one questions how they happened to be there just split them up and take them back.  In the hallway they meet Pam who is leaving the psychiatrists office having exchanged sex (which she describes as Oozy but productive) for her release back into general population.

She arrives just in time for the big announcement.  Tru Blood is now available for all and they will all be getting their own bottle.  Obviously those in the know are not too thrilled about this and don’t drink but sadly those in the know include James ….. who can’t keep it to himself and takes pity on the poor Steve Newlin (who almost gets bullied out of his bottle anyway until the guards intervene) and tells him not to drink it either.  UGH James you stupid stupid boy!! What are you thinking? We all know this is going to end badly … and it does!!! When Sarah finds out that certain vamps aren’t drinking the their spiked drinks she immediately asks if Steve is one of them and then tortures him by having him run on a giant hamster wheel under the threat of UV light.  Steve, being the spineless cry baby that he is soon gives up all he knows and that he got the info from James without ever being touched by evil UV rays. So pathetic. He is SUCH a 4!!!!  With the new info Sarah comes up with a new plan.  All those that refuse to drink will be escorted to the white room, which we soon see is the room from Bill’s visions, the room where they all meet the sun.  This is not good.  We get to see Steve and James put in there and Steve sobbing and crying to Sarah …. yep because that is going to help Steve!  We don’t, however get to see what happens to them until later.

In the meantime Sam has returned to Merlottes and is greeted by Alcide who lets him know that he has returned Nicole and her Mom who were kidnapped by the crazy Rikki.  Looks like Alcide is back to the old Alcide and no more pack for him.  Yep knew he wouldn’t kill Rikki.  Shame .. she totally deserved it.  So Alcide heads off to drink in the bar while Nicole and her Mom have a drink with Sam in his trailer.  Yes all very dull ….. Nicole’s mom doesn’t feel safe (sensible woman) but she still goes off to bed.  Nicole and Sam have a moment outside and he starts smelling her hair ….. OK you know that means something shifter based and sure enough when he is in the bar talking to Alcide (yep they are all friendly again) Alcide mentions it and it becomes quite obvious that Nicole is pregnant.  YAWN!!!!! What happened to Luna being the love of his life?  It has been just a few days and yet he is all ready to move on with everything.  Damn shifters!

Moving on to more stuff that I am totally done with … the whole Terry mess.  Arlene is nicely hung over but Lafayette has a nice plate of greasy breakfast for her (and it looks GOOD … I love fried bread …. not something I have seen much of since moving from England ….. my husband was trying to insist that Lafayette had in fact made Grilled Cheese but I know I was right .. and it was breakfast …. yes I know totally off topic but still more interesting to me than this storyline) …… So yes Lafayette made breakfast and then broke the news about the life insurance.  Adelyn was listening in to Arlene’s head and hears that all is not good in there with lots of guilt to go around including some thrown the young fairy’s way as she needs to stop being in people’s head.  This gives the cue for both of them to storm off unhappy (very important for later that Adelyn be alone).

I am going to wrap all the Terry from this week up here because … well honestly not a lot of it makes sense … I mean last week I was moaning that Arlene seemed to have buried him already … this week we go to the funeral home to plan things.  And it is all a little ridiculous.  Old Mrs Bellefleur is there (now I am assuming it is meant to be Caroline????… yep checked the credits .. it is but they got a new actress… and she is NOT as good) and she wants a full 21 gun salute because that is how they do things which I agree with Arlene is in rather bad taste in this case.  Arlene goes outside but eventually calms down and the funeral is set and even though she worked out who shot him Andy convinces her that if she presses him to investigate the life insurance won’t pay out so better to just pretend nobody knows anything.  So bored with this whole thing.  Seriously .. OVER IT!

Sookie visits Bill, in the daylight, and they have a little chat in which Bill basically tells her to hurry up and just do it already and he doesn’t care about her little issues and that the deal sounds quite fair which comes as a bit of a shock to little Miss Sookie who was obviously expecting a little more sympathy. But we all know she is going to do it .. but first a little stop via Merlottes where she successfully manages to interrupt Sam trying to get Nicole to stay (it wasn’t hard he asked she said yes but Mom was not amused) and whisk Sam off to his office where she shows him her little light ball and then drops the bom that she always thought they would end up together.  Way to mess with the guy Sookie!! (And yes totally ripped from the last book!!!). Sam, to his credit, is not in the mood for this Sookie drama and so poor Sookie runs off and we get  an agonizing hour (well actually it is more like 5 minutes but seriously when watching it it FELT like an hour) of Sookie talking to her parents’ gravestones and then painstakingly getting ready, leaving a voicemail for Jason (Niall is missing, Terry is dead, the funeral is in the morning I will save you a seat, sorry to leave this in a voicemail), until she eventually arranges to meet Bill that evening.

In other day time romps, Holly has called her sons and had them go and take Adelyn out for the day (complete with a big bottle of booze … I am betting Holly didn’t count on that one) and off they go to get drunk.  Skip ahead to the night and one brother is pretty much passed out while the other decides to get hot and heavy with the young fairy.  All is going well (especially for the brother that manages to get Adelyn’s top off) until Eric appears.  Pulling her top on as she goes Adelyn takes off running while Eric glamours the 2 brothers in to forgetting that he was ever there and (with a smirk) forgetting that Adelyn was ever there too even though it means for the one brother he has to forget he managed to get a girls top off … he even apologizes for taking that memory away.  With the boys safely glamoured Eric is free to take off after the fairy girl and with his speed he catches her (and drinks from her quite deeply) but as we see her running down the road only to be picked up by Andy we know that he doesn’t kill her.

Back to vamp camp and the best Sarah Newlin scene ever!!!  Sarah is slowly unravelling as everyone is asking for the Governor but it is when the Tru Blood exec turns up and forces her way despite Sarah’s best “we are both strong women plea” in to the camp that everything really gets good … I mean goes wrong. With Sarah chasing the exec wildly through the corridors the exec soon realises there is something very wrong going on in that place with screams that she needs to inform the FDA….. oh honey that is the least of your problems right now!!! Sarah chasing her down in ridiculously high heels is awesome and the fighting is pretty good too. So glad they decided not to go for the typical girl fight, hair pulling etc, but Sarah finally gets the exec to the ground and starts slamming her head into a metal grate … right about the male general population room who rush to lick the blood that is pouring from the execs head to their floor below.  To finish things off, Sarah grabs the exec’s ridiculous high heel leopard print shoes and slams it into her head screaming DIE DIE DIE … and when she does … Sarah sinks back and thanks Jesus.  In a not so good episode this was definitely a highlight and very unexpected.  Not good for Sarah and her crazy vamp camp but great viewing pleasure.

While all that is going on my the male general population area back in the female area Violet is called out for not drinking her Tru Blood.  Her excuse that Jason is keeping her fed doesn’t wash with the guards but as Violet is yet to know about the Tru Blood problem she is quite happy to go get hers …. until Tara opens her big mouth and says that by Violet drinking that their Jason problem will sort itself out.  Of course Violet hears and so wants to know why they aren’t drinking it and so the result is Violet, Jessica, Tara, Willa and Pam all end up in the white room where we see that Steve and James are in fact still alive … but Jessica recognizes the room and realizes that is where they are all going to meet the sun as seen in Bill’s vision.  Even Pam looks worried!

So quick Time Out here before I get to the finale part (where I will have even more questions) …… I want to talk about Hep V for a minute ….. now I know Nora got a nice big syringe worth straight into the veins but she then lasted less than 48 hours but she was 600 years old AND was boosted with Bill’s blood.  So why are NONE of the vamps, even the weakest level 4’s showing ANY symptoms yet?  Doesn’t make sense to me.  Surely they would at least look a little sluggish?  Hmmmmm doesn’t quite add up for me.  Probably just an oversight although even in upcoming previews we are not seeing any signs of the virus spreading through the system.  *sigh*.  Does anyone else ponder these things??

OK back to the show and Sookie is once again in full command of her Fairy powers and tells Bill to hold her hands so she can transport them both to Fairy Land where Warlow is waiting. Hmmmmm OK.  Sadly for them when they get there they see Warlow is still tied to the gravestone but definitely not looking too well…. he has been completely drained … but we know he isn’t dead as he is a vampire and not a pile of goo.   Sookie has no idea what happened but Bill just says one word …. ERIC!!!! and roll credits … and show an awesome preview for next week ……

Now here is my problem …… The whole drinking fairy rules seem to have changed.  In Season 4 when Eric drank a fairy he got nicely, and very amusingly drunk …… Jessica drank 4 fairies … and kinda sorta got high (she was a miserable drunk / high though) and nowhere near the level that Eric did … now is this because she drank baby fairies?  We know that Sookie’s blood tastes great and allows temporary day walks but no drunk feeling …. because well we assume she is part fairy?? So what is the deal here?  How did Eric get into Fairy land?? Just because he drank some fairy blood??? If that is the case Bill drunk Warlow’s blood which is obviously far stronger, AND we already know gave him a connection to him and yet Bill couldn’t find his way there but Eric could?  Dear writers can you just make up a set of rules and stick to them?  That would be much appreciated and would save me having to mull over these things for a ridiculously looooooong time and not come up with any answers BECAUSE YOU KEEP CHANGING THINGS!!!!

That being said I want it to be Sunday now …. because WAITING SUCKS!!!!!

V””V

My Favorite Lines From “Dead Meat”

• Pam –  “yes from everything I know about her she seems like the sharing type!”
• Andy  – “You aren’t even 2 weeks old so no I will not get you some coffee”
• Bill – “It seems really quite fair …. he would be doing us a rather large favor”
• Nicole’s Mom – “May I ask how old YOU are Silver Fox”
  Andy – ” I am trying to decide if it’s going to be more uncomfortable for me in here or out there”
• Sarah – “DIE DIE DIE …… thank you Jesus”
• Sookie – “Destiny is too much of a bitch to keep fighting”